Twenty-Fourth Tuesday

Dear Readers,

Wow, we are really coming along nicely...24+ blogs. Special blog-out to my Lovely who strong-armed me into starting this blog. Maybe "strong-arm" is an exaggeration, but it is what it is. How is everyone today? I'm in a hot hot hot school with very very very aggressive bugs. You take that for what it sounds like, I'm not opening a discussion. So. Yesterday was Monday and you know what that means....
JOG JOG JOG JOG

We decided to switch things up and hit the trails instead of the track. I for one did not want to compete with the football tryouts. There is nothing more agitating to jog in the hot sun, except to jog in the hot sun with adolescents racing by you for "fun". These kids run like they really do have wings. While we are jogging, sweating, gasping and nearly crying from the sweat salting our contacts, these kids are running with smiles! I'd say that is real evidence of age. Adults don't smile when they run, children do. When we run, we are either working out (no smile) or escaping The Killer (no smile). If you ever happen to see an adult running with a smile, RUN, because he/she is The Killer.

The trail was a nice change of pace, because there was more to look at, in the same turn I saw a butterfly and a homeless person. By no means am I saying anything bad about the homeless person, but the homeless are a part of the city, so why credit the butterfly and ignore the homeless? This could turn into a PSA (public service announcement)but I will let it be. Did I ever tell you how incredibly S-L-O-W I can be? No? Good, its none of your damned concern. Actually, I didn't know what PSA meant for the longest time. That is not the only acronym that I missed. The sad part is, when I actually do realize the meanings, I have these illuminating moments of truth, in which I want to share my new found knowledge, but I don't want to look like the ass who just realized AMEX is American Express or GWB is George Washington Bridge. There are so many more, but I think those three should applease your need to mock me.

So in between JogDays, we have WeightLiftingDays, I did not want to weight train, especially once it was bought to my attention that we must also do sit-ups. It all sounded like a whole lot of "oh crap, oh no, c'mon, seriously". What I am about to share with you Dear Readers is the weight routine that My Lovely has put together for us. I'm not charging you anything, because this is no great secret and also because I know that you cheapskates won't pay me, as evident of the CLICK RIGHT HERE attempted many blogs ago. I'm still waiting for checks.

Crickets.

Everything is done in reps of 15. First we did three reps of sit-ups. I honestly thought that I would not be able to do the sit-ups and complained to my Lovely. Uh yeah, long story short, I actually made them look hella easy. Since she loves me, I'm still here...because if we were nemesis(s?), I'd be Dead and Gone (great book, look it up dear). I came up with a rather creative way to inspire my Lovely to complete her sit-ups, shut up your mouth. For the weight training, we did three different exercises. We held the weight(s) above and behind our heads and lifted. I was uber concerned that I was going to hit my head, or crumble my spine, that I could not keep my elbow in the right position. My Lovely had to hold my elbows, I looked like a really weird crab. Then we steadied one hand on the desk (yes, we work out in an office-don't judge)and then with the weight in the other hand we swung it behind us. The last one was seated on the couch (yes we have a couch in the office, that's how we do) and lifted the weight from between our legs. It is not as erotic as it sounds.

We are really determined to keep up our regimen. I really enjoyed the trail, we even did this cool Rocky-esque run up and down the stairs. I felt so pumped, I leaped on top of a bench and jogged across. That was a sight, I'm not a short woman. I've been described as a tall drink of water...I'd rather a quick shot of rum-but that's just me.

Were we supposed to cover anything else? I don't think so, I'm trying to keep things simple-its really too hot to be Oh So Lola. I went to see my good friend in the hospital yesterday. He recently suffered a stroke. He can't really speak, so it was just me blabbing away. I hope I entertained him. He sort of smiled, but mostly grimaced. I offered to return and he nodded, but when I offered to read to him, he opted out. I hope you feel better. In fact, I know you will feel better and when you are ready, we will laugh about this. Take care.

Dear Readers, I know that you don't like to end on a somewhat sad point, so here is another point...maybe, just maybe a veryclose friend of mine will be having gasp twins instead of one lonesome baby. I am still gasping over her pregnancy, let alone two for the bang of one. To protect her privacy, I won't share her name-well I don't share anyone's name...so I lovingly dub her Mommy2B(x2?)...aka M2B. M2B will know in early September if she is going to need one of those clumsy dual strollers. OMG..I am really excited, one, two or even three, I'm excited. She is a reader, so if she reads this and wants my head on a platter with a side of fries and onion rings, then I will leave well enough alone. I love you in a really platonic happy I'm not your baby daddy way...speaking of which the father of the baby(ies) is a great guy too.

See-I cover all bases.
Today is August 18. Some notable dates according to Wikipedia:
1920 – The Nineteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution is ratified, guaranteeing women's suffrage.
1934 – Roberto Clemente, Puerto Rican baseball player and humanitarian (d. 1972)
1952 – Patrick Swayze, American actor
1970 – Malcolm-Jamal Warner, American actor

Today is also National Bad Poetry Day.

Roses are red,
violets are blue,
icy is the Popsicle unless its a creamsicle,
then creamy it be.
Fly a butterfly,
Sting like a bee,
Eat like a vegan,
No meat for me

That is my contribution to Bad Poetry Day. I'm sorry that I used the whole roses, violets, butterfly and bee...and no I'm not a vegan. Perhaps in my next life I will be

Lola, the vegan bee
Who sleeps with the Lovely butterfly
While suckling on Popsicles
and jogging through obstacles

You get me. That's why I love you.

Lola