Dear Readers,
Ewwww winter! I am not a winter person. Yes, I am a winter baby, but like most babies I certainly did not ask to be born, much less at the end of February.
I'm in a mood to talk about my mornings. I feel like you need to know every aspect of my mundane life. You are still reading, so perhaps you agree. For you smarty pants Readers, don't think I don't know that you are right about....hold on...there...rolling your eyes. I roll mine too. I always try to get to bed at a decent hour, but I am too multitask. I bet you can tell that by my steller tangents.
Every story has a beginning, so its not fair to talk mornings until we talk nights. Ooo la laaaa..no, I am not about to tell you anything about that aspect of my evenings. Sorry. I put the Patterson and McKinley to bed at 8pm. That is when my evening officially starts. Between 8 and midnight, I do all or some of the following in no specific order or fashion:
laundry
blogging
internet surf
facebook stalk
plan meals
read
watch tv
doze off
clip recipes
get on and off the scale
talk on the phone to my Lovely
obsess about snacking
procrastinate
blog about procrastinating
obsess about my need for a pedicure
To last night, you can add in unclog the toilet. Patterson clogged the toilet and then McKinley had a nosebleed. I'm not saying anything else. Feel very sorry for me.
This morning was like any other morning. I tend to get up really relaxed maybe too relaxed. Since we have to be on time most of the time, the morning is more structured. Mmhmm yeah, structured.
4:55: Open one eye and squint at the time
5am: Best alarm tone EVER, John Legend crooning good morning
5:10 on with the news and out of the bed
From 5:10-6:10 I have my hour to wash the dishes, water the plants, make coffee, shower, get dressed, tap the hamster tank, hop on the scale, check my email, make my breakfast and sometimes meals for the day, and be pissed off at my closet.
Throughout that hour, everytime I pass the kids' room I try to wake them up. I usually start off really nice, like the best alarm tone EVER, Mr. John Legend. They don't respond to that and I have to get a little hood on them. McKinley always asks for five more minutes, little does she know that I just call her five minutes earlier, so I don't feel it. McKinley always gets up first and easy. Patterson is like rousing the dead. Typically by 6:17, I'm bellowing and threatening him with all types of bodily harm.
Between 6:30-6:40, I've had it. I'm threatening everyone, including poor McKinley who does not deserve it. I have to go through the checklist: bookbags, keys, turn off the lights, keys, hats, jackets, TURN OFF THE LIGHTS...
The three of us walk about two blocks together and we go our separate ways. It does not matter how much yelling, tooth sucking or eye rolling has gone on, we always hug and kiss goodbye.
They are my kids and I love them. I may not LIKE them all the time, but I love them.
I love you too, and I don't know you well enough to dislike you. Does that make sense?
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Sunday, November 29, 2009
37th-39th Tuesday Thanksgiving Edition - Slightly Imperfect
Dear Readers,
Should I just address this to one Dear Reader, because I am almost positive that you are all tired of my untimely schedule. Listen (read). I don't want to write just to write. Granted I do have something to say every single day, I just tend to run out of time. I'm so sorry. How was your holiday? I cooked, but nothing spectacular, unless you consider stuffed mushrooms and/or macaroni and cheese with bacon and sauteed onions spectacular.
I miss talking to you, I swear. Even at this moment, its not the best time for a blog. We are waiting for my Lovely's parents to arrive from Florida. They are battling Thanksgiving traffic and we are just sitting. If anything I am blogging because I have all this nervous energy. I don't know....OMG THE BELL!!
I'm sorry Dear Readers, but the PARENTS are here. I have to post this because I never start a blog without posting. I have to go, so we can eat soup. There was jumping and hugging and tearing and happy family all around.
Now it feels like Thanksgiving.
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
Should I just address this to one Dear Reader, because I am almost positive that you are all tired of my untimely schedule. Listen (read). I don't want to write just to write. Granted I do have something to say every single day, I just tend to run out of time. I'm so sorry. How was your holiday? I cooked, but nothing spectacular, unless you consider stuffed mushrooms and/or macaroni and cheese with bacon and sauteed onions spectacular.
I miss talking to you, I swear. Even at this moment, its not the best time for a blog. We are waiting for my Lovely's parents to arrive from Florida. They are battling Thanksgiving traffic and we are just sitting. If anything I am blogging because I have all this nervous energy. I don't know....OMG THE BELL!!
I'm sorry Dear Readers, but the PARENTS are here. I have to post this because I never start a blog without posting. I have to go, so we can eat soup. There was jumping and hugging and tearing and happy family all around.
Now it feels like Thanksgiving.
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
Friday, November 13, 2009
36th Tuesday, Unfinished Business As Is
Dear Readers,
How are you? Good Shabbos! What you didn't know? Well now you do. I know that I was going to continue with the 35th Tuesday, since it got all heady and all, but I don't feel like it. One of the great things about a blog that I am unpaid for is that I get to blog about what I want. Now until someone starts writing me a check, it is what it is.
I'll have you know that it is the end of my workday and I have a task to complete. This is a task that I can complete at home, but I've had weeks to do it and now I am bordering on procrastinating. I'm blogging to you Dear Readers for two reason, 1)I owe you, 2)You wake up my creativity. I thank you.
Remember many blogs ago when I mentioned that I wish there was Dear Reader Mail? Well, one of my Followers is a very good friend of mine and she (along with others) who are privy to my personal email do email me when the blog so moves them to. You too, can email me, all you need to do is become a Follower of my blog and you can do all sorts of stuff. Its way cool, not as cool as IMDB, but pretty darn close. Somewhere around this page will show you how to do it, if the emails start pouring in, I know that you did the right thing. Whom amongst us would neglect to do the right thing, right Mr. Lee?
Last weekend I had a birthday dinner for my youngest sister and of course I cooked everything. The menu was very nice and actually saved by my Lovely. My overachieving self was ready to cook everything, but she reined me in. The final menu was as follows: cheesy sausage dip, mango & avocado salad, fried macaroni & cheese balls, tossed salad, lime cilantro shrimp, garlic fingerlings and slow-roasted chicken. Are your eyes still stuck on fried macaroni & cheese balls? If you are in the majority, they must be.
My Lovely suggested the balls as opposed to my regular stuffed mushrooms. Initially I was excited to make something different, especially since I thought it would be less time intensive than the mushrooms. Boy was I wrong. The full recipe can be found here: foodnetwork.com/recipes/behind-the-bash/fried-mac-and-cheese-balls-recipe/index.html. The link is not highlighting for some reason, probably there is some freaking copyright issue. Whatever man. Now if you read the recipe you will see that the recipe is actually an overnight prep. You need to make the mac & cheese, cool it in the fridge, make balls (I used a small ice cream scoop), lay them out on a tray and freeze them overnight. The next day, you egg wash, bread crumb and fry. That sounds hella easy, except for the fact that I started cooking late, so by the time the ballation was supposed to go down, I fell asleep. My Lovely was kind enough to call, waking me up and then Patterson was so kind to help me.
I can tell you that I was one pissed off baller. OMG. There is little more annoying to wake from a peaceful warm sleep to start balling up cold macaroni & cheese in the cruel lighting of my kitchen. Ohhhh I was cursing those balls out something fierce. A good cook cooks with love, I was homicidal. I don't know how no one choked on the balls the next day, I was spewing some real bad vibes all over that dish. Patterson kept me sane and even microwaved some coffee to perk me up.
When and if you make this dish, be real easy with the frying oil. Be mindful that the cheeses already have oil and if you overdo the frying oil, the balls will be too greasy. I had some leftovers, this dish was an appetizer and the average guest ate about three. I had enough leftover to fry some for a fellow cook a few days later, send her home with a ziploc bag of some frozen ones for home, AND bring some to work for my staff. I also found that the balls could just as easily be put in a bowl frozen, then microwaved for a quick meal. That's what the kids had for dinner one night, mac & cheese and spinach.
So while the prep is a bit time consuming, the final product is good enough that I would do it again.
That concludes the Cooking With Lola segment. If you try this recipe, let me know.
Naturally all this food talk reminds me that I need to carry myself to the gym. The last time I looked at the gym schedule was to push it and its magnet out of the way so that I could open the fridge for a piece of cake. I'm not kidding. That's how I do. I even highlighted the classes that I want to take, knowing damn well that I am WAY too shy and uncoordinated for a gym class. I might, MIGHT, take a class, simply to come back and blog my findings. At least its research and the embarrassment will be minimal. I hope. Stay tuned, but don't hold your breath for that madness.
Oh hell to the naw...a very close friend just texted me. She only texted me "Yooooooooooo". Clearly she has forgotten that I have a pitifully small text package on my phone and that is truly a waste. I would give her a piece of my mind right here, but I know she will never get around to reading my blogs. I won't respond to her, because that will be another text on my part and she will likely text me right back despite my plea to cut it out. I love her, but damn woman.
I really have to go. The weekend is here and I need to get the kids together to go AWAY from me so that I can help my Lovely with a few projects. I was kind of killing time, hoping to get a ride, but alas, that is not in the cards for your heroine today.
I have to make moves. You get way more attention than my personal blog. I love her, and I want to write, but I keep her in my bed..so by the time I'm pulling her out for some real therapeutic writing, I'm dozing off-or not...insert eyebrow wagging here. I need to keep her in a more active area-like at work!
Hahahahaha...like IMDB and you don't keep me busy enough on the clock.
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
How are you? Good Shabbos! What you didn't know? Well now you do. I know that I was going to continue with the 35th Tuesday, since it got all heady and all, but I don't feel like it. One of the great things about a blog that I am unpaid for is that I get to blog about what I want. Now until someone starts writing me a check, it is what it is.
I'll have you know that it is the end of my workday and I have a task to complete. This is a task that I can complete at home, but I've had weeks to do it and now I am bordering on procrastinating. I'm blogging to you Dear Readers for two reason, 1)I owe you, 2)You wake up my creativity. I thank you.
Remember many blogs ago when I mentioned that I wish there was Dear Reader Mail? Well, one of my Followers is a very good friend of mine and she (along with others) who are privy to my personal email do email me when the blog so moves them to. You too, can email me, all you need to do is become a Follower of my blog and you can do all sorts of stuff. Its way cool, not as cool as IMDB, but pretty darn close. Somewhere around this page will show you how to do it, if the emails start pouring in, I know that you did the right thing. Whom amongst us would neglect to do the right thing, right Mr. Lee?
Last weekend I had a birthday dinner for my youngest sister and of course I cooked everything. The menu was very nice and actually saved by my Lovely. My overachieving self was ready to cook everything, but she reined me in. The final menu was as follows: cheesy sausage dip, mango & avocado salad, fried macaroni & cheese balls, tossed salad, lime cilantro shrimp, garlic fingerlings and slow-roasted chicken. Are your eyes still stuck on fried macaroni & cheese balls? If you are in the majority, they must be.
My Lovely suggested the balls as opposed to my regular stuffed mushrooms. Initially I was excited to make something different, especially since I thought it would be less time intensive than the mushrooms. Boy was I wrong. The full recipe can be found here: foodnetwork.com/recipes/behind-the-bash/fried-mac-and-cheese-balls-recipe/index.html. The link is not highlighting for some reason, probably there is some freaking copyright issue. Whatever man. Now if you read the recipe you will see that the recipe is actually an overnight prep. You need to make the mac & cheese, cool it in the fridge, make balls (I used a small ice cream scoop), lay them out on a tray and freeze them overnight. The next day, you egg wash, bread crumb and fry. That sounds hella easy, except for the fact that I started cooking late, so by the time the ballation was supposed to go down, I fell asleep. My Lovely was kind enough to call, waking me up and then Patterson was so kind to help me.
I can tell you that I was one pissed off baller. OMG. There is little more annoying to wake from a peaceful warm sleep to start balling up cold macaroni & cheese in the cruel lighting of my kitchen. Ohhhh I was cursing those balls out something fierce. A good cook cooks with love, I was homicidal. I don't know how no one choked on the balls the next day, I was spewing some real bad vibes all over that dish. Patterson kept me sane and even microwaved some coffee to perk me up.
When and if you make this dish, be real easy with the frying oil. Be mindful that the cheeses already have oil and if you overdo the frying oil, the balls will be too greasy. I had some leftovers, this dish was an appetizer and the average guest ate about three. I had enough leftover to fry some for a fellow cook a few days later, send her home with a ziploc bag of some frozen ones for home, AND bring some to work for my staff. I also found that the balls could just as easily be put in a bowl frozen, then microwaved for a quick meal. That's what the kids had for dinner one night, mac & cheese and spinach.
So while the prep is a bit time consuming, the final product is good enough that I would do it again.
That concludes the Cooking With Lola segment. If you try this recipe, let me know.
Naturally all this food talk reminds me that I need to carry myself to the gym. The last time I looked at the gym schedule was to push it and its magnet out of the way so that I could open the fridge for a piece of cake. I'm not kidding. That's how I do. I even highlighted the classes that I want to take, knowing damn well that I am WAY too shy and uncoordinated for a gym class. I might, MIGHT, take a class, simply to come back and blog my findings. At least its research and the embarrassment will be minimal. I hope. Stay tuned, but don't hold your breath for that madness.
Oh hell to the naw...a very close friend just texted me. She only texted me "Yooooooooooo". Clearly she has forgotten that I have a pitifully small text package on my phone and that is truly a waste. I would give her a piece of my mind right here, but I know she will never get around to reading my blogs. I won't respond to her, because that will be another text on my part and she will likely text me right back despite my plea to cut it out. I love her, but damn woman.
I really have to go. The weekend is here and I need to get the kids together to go AWAY from me so that I can help my Lovely with a few projects. I was kind of killing time, hoping to get a ride, but alas, that is not in the cards for your heroine today.
I have to make moves. You get way more attention than my personal blog. I love her, and I want to write, but I keep her in my bed..so by the time I'm pulling her out for some real therapeutic writing, I'm dozing off-or not...insert eyebrow wagging here. I need to keep her in a more active area-like at work!
Hahahahaha...like IMDB and you don't keep me busy enough on the clock.
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
The Real 35th Tuesday/Julie Newmar & Unfinished Projects
Good Morning Readers,
I did not go to the gym last night. Nope. An opportunity knocked and I answered. Ok? I know you don't judge me and if you do, I'd never know since Dear Reader Mail has never taken off.
Like everyone else in the world I have a Yahoo account. The standard signature on all of my outgoing mail is a quote from a movie, television show or song. I don't know how long I've done the quotes, but in the beginning I would change it frequently so that the recipient of the email would have a little bonus at the end. This is just that type of person I am. heh. Anyhow, I wanted to change my quote today to something from the Swayze movie when he plays Vida, the drag queen. You've probably seen the movie, To Wong Foo With Love, Julie Newmar.
I find all my movie quotes at Internet Movie Database (www.imdb.com). I'm not on their payroll, but I strongly suggest you check it out. Just please check it out at home, because if you check while at work, you will NOT GET A THING DONE. After I found my quote, I read through some of the trivia regarding the movie, which led me to look up the actress Julie Newmar. Two of her quotes, caused me to look up her fan site:
I'm magnificent! I'm 5'11" and I weigh 135 pounds, and I look like a racehorse.
Tell me I'm beautiful, it's nothing. Tell me I'm intellectual - I know it. Tell me I'm funny and it's the greatest compliment in the world anyone could give me.
Alright. Dear Readers, Julie Newmar if you don't know (I didn't) was the Catwoman in 1966's Batman. Oh hell..she was fine then and she is fine now. She is in her 70's now and I would gladly trade my curves for hers. Now, don't get me wrong-I have no desire to look like a racehorse, but I'm just saying. I'm nearly 5'11" and at my smallest (yes smallest)my fighting weight (I love that expression) was 158lbs. At 158lbs I looked like I was one missed breakfast from a praying mantis. Everyone has their own personal Julie Newmar, by my definition your own personal Julie Newmar is where you reach that KA-POW status.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a brick house, its just that some of my rooms are too packed with furniture, and I'm not as svelte as I'd like to be. My personal Julie Newmar is 165lbs. That's where I want to be.
As far as her second quote, I feel the same way. I've come a long way from my ugly duckling status. I've always been intelligent. I love being funny. I love that I crack myself up. I love that I don't need anyone to laugh for me to feel good. I don't try to be funny, but I am. A guy on Facebook whom I know from school said that the hardest thing about being the "funny guy" is that people are always waiting for the punchline. Those are not his exact words, but I don't really care because I have better chance of Ellen reading this to Portia as she twitters it, than that random guy from school seeing it.
That reminds me, my daughter McKinley was shocked that there are other celebrity lesbian actresses besides Helen (Ellen) and her famous girlfriend. Am I being lax as a lesbian mom? Maybe I should give her a list of prominent gays in America. I know I was pressured when McKinley and Patterson were young to educate them on prominent Blacks and Latinos. Did I say too much? Listen, my way of educating McKinley was to make sure all of her dolls looked like her. I also tried to push That's So Raven on her instead of Hannah Montana. As far as Patterson, one afternoon in the employee cafe I was showing off pictures of him and someone asked me how I planned on raising my Black son to be a Black man. Wot? Does this story need to be punctuate by the fact that the woman who asked is a Black woman who was always angry about something? She was the Angry Black Girl character from all the Real World shows. I asked her what she meant and she told me that since I can "pass", what was I going to teach him about his color?
Dear Readers, I am charged with raising children of Black and Latino descent on my own as a Black Latino Lesbian...do you know how much that is, a real mouthful. Don't get me wrong, my story is no longer, nor more important than anyone else's, but its mine-therefore important to me, at least.
I do the best that I can. As a woman, I have to teach my daughter to be a strong woman and teach my son to be a strong man. Both have to have some sort of cultural influence...I'm not big on organized religion so I can be easy on that. I know that there will never be a picture of the Last Supper in my home..not the blond blue-eyed version, nor the wooly-haired version. What am I supposed to do? Hang a picture of Martin Luther King next to Ellen Degeneres next to Edwin Torres? Should I have flash cards? OMG..the thought of it is overwhelming, even more overwhelming is that this blog was supposed to be lighthearted and about a pin-up queen and now LOOK. Gosh.
I wear myself out. I wonder how you, Dear Readers, positively influence your children. I bought my son a Cabbage Patch Doll and everyone in my family was mortified. I thought it was a great gift. When my daughter was about 3, she was looking at pictures of herself in the presence of my sister. McKinley was pointing out how pretty she looked in a picture and said that she looked so pretty, just like a lesbian. I'm surprised my sister did not stuff her in a duffel and run away with her.
Ugh. There is responsibility calling...I don't feel right ending this blog like this. I hate that I start projects and never end them..although hating it does not prevent me from repeating the behavior.
That being said, this blog will be considered unfinished business until it comes up again.
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
I did not go to the gym last night. Nope. An opportunity knocked and I answered. Ok? I know you don't judge me and if you do, I'd never know since Dear Reader Mail has never taken off.
Like everyone else in the world I have a Yahoo account. The standard signature on all of my outgoing mail is a quote from a movie, television show or song. I don't know how long I've done the quotes, but in the beginning I would change it frequently so that the recipient of the email would have a little bonus at the end. This is just that type of person I am. heh. Anyhow, I wanted to change my quote today to something from the Swayze movie when he plays Vida, the drag queen. You've probably seen the movie, To Wong Foo With Love, Julie Newmar.
I find all my movie quotes at Internet Movie Database (www.imdb.com). I'm not on their payroll, but I strongly suggest you check it out. Just please check it out at home, because if you check while at work, you will NOT GET A THING DONE. After I found my quote, I read through some of the trivia regarding the movie, which led me to look up the actress Julie Newmar. Two of her quotes, caused me to look up her fan site:
I'm magnificent! I'm 5'11" and I weigh 135 pounds, and I look like a racehorse.
Tell me I'm beautiful, it's nothing. Tell me I'm intellectual - I know it. Tell me I'm funny and it's the greatest compliment in the world anyone could give me.
Alright. Dear Readers, Julie Newmar if you don't know (I didn't) was the Catwoman in 1966's Batman. Oh hell..she was fine then and she is fine now. She is in her 70's now and I would gladly trade my curves for hers. Now, don't get me wrong-I have no desire to look like a racehorse, but I'm just saying. I'm nearly 5'11" and at my smallest (yes smallest)my fighting weight (I love that expression) was 158lbs. At 158lbs I looked like I was one missed breakfast from a praying mantis. Everyone has their own personal Julie Newmar, by my definition your own personal Julie Newmar is where you reach that KA-POW status.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a brick house, its just that some of my rooms are too packed with furniture, and I'm not as svelte as I'd like to be. My personal Julie Newmar is 165lbs. That's where I want to be.
As far as her second quote, I feel the same way. I've come a long way from my ugly duckling status. I've always been intelligent. I love being funny. I love that I crack myself up. I love that I don't need anyone to laugh for me to feel good. I don't try to be funny, but I am. A guy on Facebook whom I know from school said that the hardest thing about being the "funny guy" is that people are always waiting for the punchline. Those are not his exact words, but I don't really care because I have better chance of Ellen reading this to Portia as she twitters it, than that random guy from school seeing it.
That reminds me, my daughter McKinley was shocked that there are other celebrity lesbian actresses besides Helen (Ellen) and her famous girlfriend. Am I being lax as a lesbian mom? Maybe I should give her a list of prominent gays in America. I know I was pressured when McKinley and Patterson were young to educate them on prominent Blacks and Latinos. Did I say too much? Listen, my way of educating McKinley was to make sure all of her dolls looked like her. I also tried to push That's So Raven on her instead of Hannah Montana. As far as Patterson, one afternoon in the employee cafe I was showing off pictures of him and someone asked me how I planned on raising my Black son to be a Black man. Wot? Does this story need to be punctuate by the fact that the woman who asked is a Black woman who was always angry about something? She was the Angry Black Girl character from all the Real World shows. I asked her what she meant and she told me that since I can "pass", what was I going to teach him about his color?
Dear Readers, I am charged with raising children of Black and Latino descent on my own as a Black Latino Lesbian...do you know how much that is, a real mouthful. Don't get me wrong, my story is no longer, nor more important than anyone else's, but its mine-therefore important to me, at least.
I do the best that I can. As a woman, I have to teach my daughter to be a strong woman and teach my son to be a strong man. Both have to have some sort of cultural influence...I'm not big on organized religion so I can be easy on that. I know that there will never be a picture of the Last Supper in my home..not the blond blue-eyed version, nor the wooly-haired version. What am I supposed to do? Hang a picture of Martin Luther King next to Ellen Degeneres next to Edwin Torres? Should I have flash cards? OMG..the thought of it is overwhelming, even more overwhelming is that this blog was supposed to be lighthearted and about a pin-up queen and now LOOK. Gosh.
I wear myself out. I wonder how you, Dear Readers, positively influence your children. I bought my son a Cabbage Patch Doll and everyone in my family was mortified. I thought it was a great gift. When my daughter was about 3, she was looking at pictures of herself in the presence of my sister. McKinley was pointing out how pretty she looked in a picture and said that she looked so pretty, just like a lesbian. I'm surprised my sister did not stuff her in a duffel and run away with her.
Ugh. There is responsibility calling...I don't feel right ending this blog like this. I hate that I start projects and never end them..although hating it does not prevent me from repeating the behavior.
That being said, this blog will be considered unfinished business until it comes up again.
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
Monday, November 2, 2009
Thirty-Fifth Tuesday/Its Only Monday, People
Hello Readers,
You must think I have loads of time on my hands. I actually don't..contrary to popular belief I have a job. I swear.
Before I get into the reason for this blog, as if we need a reason...today I am going to the gym. Really. I swear. I packed my clothes and everything. I really have to get on my grind...or someone's grind. I woke up this morning with a new resolve...really. Is it foolhardy to make a fitness resolve on the first Monday after Halloween, a mere four weeks before Thanksgiving? Yes it is. Am I that type of rebel? Yes I am. As I sit here still sucking bits of snickers from my back teeth, I swear. I'm psyched. I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin'. Tomorrow, if I feel up to it after I PUMP MYSELF UP, I will fill you in on the Five People I Met In The Gym.
Yesterday, my Lovely asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I didn't have an answer for her. At the time, I didn't think it was a big deal, I figured I would just think about it. During my thinking time, this morning between 6:05 and 6:17, I realized what a travesty this really is. Do you know why, Dear Readers, I cannot decide what I want for Christmas?
First of all, the biggest culprit of them all: PARENTHOOD. Yes, I said it. As a parent, when asked what I want for Christmas, I first think of what my children want, then onto what they need...sometime at the end of this mind debilitating process, I think about what I need, which ties into nicely what they need. Here is an example..hmm the kids could use a new dictionary, I could use a Barnes & Noble gift card...see?! Isn't that some ish? Are my senses dulled so much that I can barely see what I might want/need without the seeing the world through the thick, heavy, black-rimmed glasses of PARENTHOOD?
Second of all, and this is the small culprit: I'm not used to getting what I ask for as opposed to what I get. My Lovely loves lists, so here is a list...the first column is what I asked for, the next is what I got...I'm not going to bore you with the ages, I don't remember anyway.
1. GEM doll (Gem, Gem is my Name).......Roxy
2. A flute.....................a plastic recorder
3. An Etch A Sketch.............a Lite Bright
4. An Easy Bake Oven.............PlayDoh Spaghetti Head
5. Ms. Pacman Game...............Mr. Potato Head Doll
6. A leather jacket.............a blue husky coat from Fingerhut
7. Reeboks....................Ellese
I'm sure that there is more, but those are the items that really stood out to me over the years. The Roxy doll was the most disappointing. Even the blue husky coat from Fingerhut had big enough husky pockets for me to carry a book, furthering my Nerddom.
Here is the tear jerker portion of our time together today, what I really want for Christmas is a hug from my grandmother. Of course she is long gone, all of my grandparents are gone. I miss them terribly. Sometimes I feel panicked that I am forgetting her voice or her touch, but usually I am blessed enough to dream of her. Dear Readers, we are going to let this part of the blog go before I start weeping all over my keyboard, not a pretty sight.
Breathe.
Ok. I have a lot of wants, but I know that I need to separate my wants from my needs. I don't really want world peace, I'm not sacrificing enough to wish for such a grand thing. Can I say sacrificing or do I say sacrificial? Hmm. World peace would be nice and leave something good for my kids and my grandkids, wait...am I again worrying about WHAT THEY NEED/WANT? See what I mean? Sucks to be me. I still have a bit of a weep in the back of mind because now I am fixated on my grandma. Crap. This is no way to brainstorm gifts.
Here is my list of selfish all about me forget the rest of the world gifts:
1. Cowboy boots (no spurs necessary)
2. Super cool phone because I'm tired of having the same phone as the 5th graders because OMG its so cool, you can change the color by clicking off the cover, my fave is the red, what's yours, Miss?
3. Spa pedicure the one that they use things I would never waste like buttermilk, sugar and no less than two people working on my feet and one extra to pass me a appletini.
4. An amazing everyday bangle, almost museum like that I would never buy for myself, but totally care for if it were a gift because I would be terrified to lose it.
5. Liposuction (its my list).
6. Roller blades with lessons, or maybe the lessons first so that they don't end up under my bed with the hula hoop.
7. Free Cablevision (see parenthesis #5).
8. A new digital camera, since mine is so yesterday.
9. The Catcher in the Rye, for the "keep" side of my bookshelf.
10. Sephora gift card, so that I can let go of all those empties in my closet.
Whew. Readers, I really had to squeeze out the last two on my list. Thank you for helping me with the process. I appreciate you, Dear Readers, I really do. To my Lovely's credit, she made me cry last year by giving me the Complete Peanuts Holiday Collection of DVDs. I don't know how she can top that. Please no one try to rouse Ms. Katherine Mendez from the DDD (Dearly Departed Department) because as much as I love my grandma, there's no need for any Stephan King up in here. I will be SO PISSED IF THERE IS A ZOMBIE GRANDMA at the table this year. I'm not kidding. Don't do me any favors. She was not happy about my lesbianism then, I doubt the afterlife has given her a better prospective.
Speaking of lesbianism and the dead, Bea Arthur left $300,000 in her will to a New York organization that aids homeless gay youth.
The Ali Fornay Center provides services to more than 1,000 each year, and is planning to buy a building to house 12 young people - and name it in honor of the "Golden Girls" actress.
Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2009/10/27/2009-10-27_golden_girls_star_bea_arthur_leaves_300000_in_will_.html#ixzz0ViYC9UGP
I think that's just lovely.
That's a beautiful thing and makes me want to watch The Golden Girls all over again, which could happen with #7 on my list. Please don't go out and buy me any seasons of The Golden Girls on DVD-I will not watch them enough and I am not long in the tooth enough to own that series. If you plan on getting me The Golden Girls, you might as well throw in the first season of The Price Is Right, if there is such a series. Just put the frosting, lock and key on my seniorism.
You get me, that's why I love you,
Lola
You must think I have loads of time on my hands. I actually don't..contrary to popular belief I have a job. I swear.
Before I get into the reason for this blog, as if we need a reason...today I am going to the gym. Really. I swear. I packed my clothes and everything. I really have to get on my grind...or someone's grind. I woke up this morning with a new resolve...really. Is it foolhardy to make a fitness resolve on the first Monday after Halloween, a mere four weeks before Thanksgiving? Yes it is. Am I that type of rebel? Yes I am. As I sit here still sucking bits of snickers from my back teeth, I swear. I'm psyched. I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin'. Tomorrow, if I feel up to it after I PUMP MYSELF UP, I will fill you in on the Five People I Met In The Gym.
Yesterday, my Lovely asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I didn't have an answer for her. At the time, I didn't think it was a big deal, I figured I would just think about it. During my thinking time, this morning between 6:05 and 6:17, I realized what a travesty this really is. Do you know why, Dear Readers, I cannot decide what I want for Christmas?
First of all, the biggest culprit of them all: PARENTHOOD. Yes, I said it. As a parent, when asked what I want for Christmas, I first think of what my children want, then onto what they need...sometime at the end of this mind debilitating process, I think about what I need, which ties into nicely what they need. Here is an example..hmm the kids could use a new dictionary, I could use a Barnes & Noble gift card...see?! Isn't that some ish? Are my senses dulled so much that I can barely see what I might want/need without the seeing the world through the thick, heavy, black-rimmed glasses of PARENTHOOD?
Second of all, and this is the small culprit: I'm not used to getting what I ask for as opposed to what I get. My Lovely loves lists, so here is a list...the first column is what I asked for, the next is what I got...I'm not going to bore you with the ages, I don't remember anyway.
1. GEM doll (Gem, Gem is my Name).......Roxy
2. A flute.....................a plastic recorder
3. An Etch A Sketch.............a Lite Bright
4. An Easy Bake Oven.............PlayDoh Spaghetti Head
5. Ms. Pacman Game...............Mr. Potato Head Doll
6. A leather jacket.............a blue husky coat from Fingerhut
7. Reeboks....................Ellese
I'm sure that there is more, but those are the items that really stood out to me over the years. The Roxy doll was the most disappointing. Even the blue husky coat from Fingerhut had big enough husky pockets for me to carry a book, furthering my Nerddom.
Here is the tear jerker portion of our time together today, what I really want for Christmas is a hug from my grandmother. Of course she is long gone, all of my grandparents are gone. I miss them terribly. Sometimes I feel panicked that I am forgetting her voice or her touch, but usually I am blessed enough to dream of her. Dear Readers, we are going to let this part of the blog go before I start weeping all over my keyboard, not a pretty sight.
Breathe.
Ok. I have a lot of wants, but I know that I need to separate my wants from my needs. I don't really want world peace, I'm not sacrificing enough to wish for such a grand thing. Can I say sacrificing or do I say sacrificial? Hmm. World peace would be nice and leave something good for my kids and my grandkids, wait...am I again worrying about WHAT THEY NEED/WANT? See what I mean? Sucks to be me. I still have a bit of a weep in the back of mind because now I am fixated on my grandma. Crap. This is no way to brainstorm gifts.
Here is my list of selfish all about me forget the rest of the world gifts:
1. Cowboy boots (no spurs necessary)
2. Super cool phone because I'm tired of having the same phone as the 5th graders because OMG its so cool, you can change the color by clicking off the cover, my fave is the red, what's yours, Miss?
3. Spa pedicure the one that they use things I would never waste like buttermilk, sugar and no less than two people working on my feet and one extra to pass me a appletini.
4. An amazing everyday bangle, almost museum like that I would never buy for myself, but totally care for if it were a gift because I would be terrified to lose it.
5. Liposuction (its my list).
6. Roller blades with lessons, or maybe the lessons first so that they don't end up under my bed with the hula hoop.
7. Free Cablevision (see parenthesis #5).
8. A new digital camera, since mine is so yesterday.
9. The Catcher in the Rye, for the "keep" side of my bookshelf.
10. Sephora gift card, so that I can let go of all those empties in my closet.
Whew. Readers, I really had to squeeze out the last two on my list. Thank you for helping me with the process. I appreciate you, Dear Readers, I really do. To my Lovely's credit, she made me cry last year by giving me the Complete Peanuts Holiday Collection of DVDs. I don't know how she can top that. Please no one try to rouse Ms. Katherine Mendez from the DDD (Dearly Departed Department) because as much as I love my grandma, there's no need for any Stephan King up in here. I will be SO PISSED IF THERE IS A ZOMBIE GRANDMA at the table this year. I'm not kidding. Don't do me any favors. She was not happy about my lesbianism then, I doubt the afterlife has given her a better prospective.
Speaking of lesbianism and the dead, Bea Arthur left $300,000 in her will to a New York organization that aids homeless gay youth.
The Ali Fornay Center provides services to more than 1,000 each year, and is planning to buy a building to house 12 young people - and name it in honor of the "Golden Girls" actress.
Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2009/10/27/2009-10-27_golden_girls_star_bea_arthur_leaves_300000_in_will_.html#ixzz0ViYC9UGP
I think that's just lovely.
That's a beautiful thing and makes me want to watch The Golden Girls all over again, which could happen with #7 on my list. Please don't go out and buy me any seasons of The Golden Girls on DVD-I will not watch them enough and I am not long in the tooth enough to own that series. If you plan on getting me The Golden Girls, you might as well throw in the first season of The Price Is Right, if there is such a series. Just put the frosting, lock and key on my seniorism.
You get me, that's why I love you,
Lola
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
32nd OK FINE 33rd Tuesday
Hello Readers....
I can't put anything past you, right? Just so you know it is 3pm Tuesday and while I could be fleeing for the hills, I choose you. Hmmm..I choose you reminds me of something...I CHOOSE YOU, SPEEDRACER...maybe. I don't know. Feel free to drop me a FB post should you 1)be a Dear Reader, 2)have a Facebook, and 3)actually know me on said FB. First things first...I had to answer a rather stupid question yesterday and I thought to myself how cool it would be if I had a VOICE. I don't mean a voice voice, duh I have that...imagine if I were a mute blogger...no I mean a VOICE. In the car the other day (never mind you, what car) a child was playing with an iPhone. The app that she was playing with was a voice scrambler thingie. I wish I had an internal voice scrambler. That way, when someone asks me a stupid question, instead of me responding in my regular LolaTone, I could say almost menacing..."WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU SHOULD DO??!!". I think I would use my powers mostly for good like, when the kids do something that I don't like..."GO TO BED RIIIIIIIIIIIGGGHHHHHHHHHT NOOOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!". For the kids I would need a special echo maker, so that I could be uber ominous. I could go on forever, but I'll let you be, seeing as its never going to happen.
Did I mention to you the looooong email that I wrote to an old friend? I think I did a few blogs ago. Well that old friend has morphed to no friend. It hurts, but not as much as it hurt to watch the friendship dwindle to nothing. Do you understand what I mean? I rather it be over than watch the wreck that it was becoming. I find it hard to believe that there is someone who rather not be my friend, but I also wish for internal voice scrambler powers, so what the hell do I know? I'm going to hold on to the good memories of the friendship and not dwell on the sad. Pardon me if I revisit now and then, its only natural. Like my hair....on to the next....
My hair is currently too short. Naturally curly hair is something I had to learn to embrace but my naturally curly hair is just too short. There is only so much that I can do with it and still look like a member of society. Between you and I, I rather it wild and all over the place...but it does not do me well. Contrary to popular belief I don't sit in Starbucks all day, dressed in purple, blogging away. I have a very regular job and I have to look a certain way. It took me years to conform to matching socks, so I am a work in progress, to say the least. Today I have a scarf folding into a headband to keep everything where it should be. Without this scarf my hair would be HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRR...instead of what it should be, hair. I love it. I just need it to grow maybe an inch more and it will be back to where I need it to be. Yesterday I had it completely covered in the scarf. That morning, I washed it and tied it down, the LazyLola way of getting some control. I thought it looked fine, until one of my staff came in...and in a "woman of a certain age" proclaimed, "get that off your head!". I realize that that was disrespectful and maybe if I were a different Lola I would have pimp smacked her, but she is reeeeeeeaaaaaaallllllyy OLD...like passport picture in coal on stone old and I just snickered and went about my day. This is the same old crone that calls me by my first name because she "can never pronounce Latina names". I think its because she knew Coco Chanel in elementary school, therefore refusing to call some infant Ms. Anything.
Whatever, Readers, you just have to let some things go. I let things go. To some, I may let things go to far, but hello...work in progress here. There was something else I wanted to talk to you about, but I cannot remember. I bet if I actually blogged weekly instead of faking the funk every other week, I would not be going through this. It is what it is, right?
Sometimes I wish I could see you when you read my blogs. Dear Readers, I want you to know that I appreciate your attention to the dire straits of my life. LOL. I'm kidding, my dire straits are no more dire than your own. Everyone has their something...and your something is the most urgent to you. I respect that. I remember!! Pikachu! I choose you, Pikachu...smh.
You get me. That's why I love you.
Lola
I can't put anything past you, right? Just so you know it is 3pm Tuesday and while I could be fleeing for the hills, I choose you. Hmmm..I choose you reminds me of something...I CHOOSE YOU, SPEEDRACER...maybe. I don't know. Feel free to drop me a FB post should you 1)be a Dear Reader, 2)have a Facebook, and 3)actually know me on said FB. First things first...I had to answer a rather stupid question yesterday and I thought to myself how cool it would be if I had a VOICE. I don't mean a voice voice, duh I have that...imagine if I were a mute blogger...no I mean a VOICE. In the car the other day (never mind you, what car) a child was playing with an iPhone. The app that she was playing with was a voice scrambler thingie. I wish I had an internal voice scrambler. That way, when someone asks me a stupid question, instead of me responding in my regular LolaTone, I could say almost menacing..."WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU SHOULD DO??!!". I think I would use my powers mostly for good like, when the kids do something that I don't like..."GO TO BED RIIIIIIIIIIIGGGHHHHHHHHHT NOOOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!". For the kids I would need a special echo maker, so that I could be uber ominous. I could go on forever, but I'll let you be, seeing as its never going to happen.
Did I mention to you the looooong email that I wrote to an old friend? I think I did a few blogs ago. Well that old friend has morphed to no friend. It hurts, but not as much as it hurt to watch the friendship dwindle to nothing. Do you understand what I mean? I rather it be over than watch the wreck that it was becoming. I find it hard to believe that there is someone who rather not be my friend, but I also wish for internal voice scrambler powers, so what the hell do I know? I'm going to hold on to the good memories of the friendship and not dwell on the sad. Pardon me if I revisit now and then, its only natural. Like my hair....on to the next....
My hair is currently too short. Naturally curly hair is something I had to learn to embrace but my naturally curly hair is just too short. There is only so much that I can do with it and still look like a member of society. Between you and I, I rather it wild and all over the place...but it does not do me well. Contrary to popular belief I don't sit in Starbucks all day, dressed in purple, blogging away. I have a very regular job and I have to look a certain way. It took me years to conform to matching socks, so I am a work in progress, to say the least. Today I have a scarf folding into a headband to keep everything where it should be. Without this scarf my hair would be HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRR...instead of what it should be, hair. I love it. I just need it to grow maybe an inch more and it will be back to where I need it to be. Yesterday I had it completely covered in the scarf. That morning, I washed it and tied it down, the LazyLola way of getting some control. I thought it looked fine, until one of my staff came in...and in a "woman of a certain age" proclaimed, "get that off your head!". I realize that that was disrespectful and maybe if I were a different Lola I would have pimp smacked her, but she is reeeeeeeaaaaaaallllllyy OLD...like passport picture in coal on stone old and I just snickered and went about my day. This is the same old crone that calls me by my first name because she "can never pronounce Latina names". I think its because she knew Coco Chanel in elementary school, therefore refusing to call some infant Ms. Anything.
Whatever, Readers, you just have to let some things go. I let things go. To some, I may let things go to far, but hello...work in progress here. There was something else I wanted to talk to you about, but I cannot remember. I bet if I actually blogged weekly instead of faking the funk every other week, I would not be going through this. It is what it is, right?
Sometimes I wish I could see you when you read my blogs. Dear Readers, I want you to know that I appreciate your attention to the dire straits of my life. LOL. I'm kidding, my dire straits are no more dire than your own. Everyone has their something...and your something is the most urgent to you. I respect that. I remember!! Pikachu! I choose you, Pikachu...smh.
You get me. That's why I love you.
Lola
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
31st Tuesday
Good Morning Readers,
I have to tell you that you are exhale worthy. I've got stuff going on, I mean stuff and its such a relief for Tuesday to roll around and I know you appreciate me. I appreciate you too.
I don't really have anything fascinating to share with you today. I just finished writing a loooooong email to an old friend. That email has left me winded to say the least. I always try my best to please everyone, but honestly that is getting tired and real, real old. The less that I promise, the more peaceful I feel. Do you know how many promises I make to myself that fall on my own deaf ears? Well if I can't even hold my own word to myself, how can I afford to make promises to anyone else?
Same for you. Don't even set yourself up. You can set yourself to meet expectations set by others, or you can make up your own expectations. Its not as painful when you fail your own expectations. You can forgive yourself. When you fail others, you work (or at least I do)so damn hard to make up and fix things that you miss other things. I'm babbling because I've spent the last hour writing and the last hours since Sunday trying to improve situations. Sometimes you need to put yourself in a time out. Just stop. Just stop. At the end of the day, its just you.
Arrrgh. This is not a blog I want to write. This is not a blog I want to write because I don't know if my spirit is here and I don't want to use you. Oh wait. This is not a blog I want to write reminds me of the most amazing collaboration ever between two singers. Way back when I thought my life was so complicated (read:teens) there was a song recorded by Madonna and Prince. I want to say the name of the song was Love Song. I don't recall ever hearing it on the radio and I'm not sure if it was on his CD or hers. Let me tell you, mesmerizing. Nevermind that I was truly head over heels in lust with the BOTH of them, their voices together was pun intended music to my ears. I wonder what ever happened to that song?
And that, Dear Readers, is how to blog. To blog is to let your mind take your fingers from key to key. It is at the very least the most refreshing exhalable thing ever. Nevermind that I get to make up words like exhalable...its my poetic licsense.
Speaking of refreshing, I have not had time to write in my personal blog, since my personal life is happening and unlike OTHER PEOPLE (1) WHO WILL REMAIN NAMELESS I have to make time to address issues that effect my life. I have to be selfish. I have to save a little for me. With two children and a Lovely, I have only but so much time for everything else. I make time to write, because this is the time I choose to have for myself. No one can take this away from me.
Alright, enough about me, what about you? What do you love about me? Challah!! Imagine if I was such an attention whore to assume that everyone's life revolves around me. You know, children believe that everything revolves around them, but unfortunately, some adults have trouble letting go of that process. You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you, whoa...that lyric has spoken to me time and time again. I wish it could be my ringtone sometimes.
Ugh, I just recieved a phone call...briiiiiing briiiiiiing life and responsibility calling....unfortunately I can't put this on hold. Thank you for understanding, and I look forward to speaking to you again. Really, the phone is ringing. Don't miss the call.
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
I have to tell you that you are exhale worthy. I've got stuff going on, I mean stuff and its such a relief for Tuesday to roll around and I know you appreciate me. I appreciate you too.
I don't really have anything fascinating to share with you today. I just finished writing a loooooong email to an old friend. That email has left me winded to say the least. I always try my best to please everyone, but honestly that is getting tired and real, real old. The less that I promise, the more peaceful I feel. Do you know how many promises I make to myself that fall on my own deaf ears? Well if I can't even hold my own word to myself, how can I afford to make promises to anyone else?
Same for you. Don't even set yourself up. You can set yourself to meet expectations set by others, or you can make up your own expectations. Its not as painful when you fail your own expectations. You can forgive yourself. When you fail others, you work (or at least I do)so damn hard to make up and fix things that you miss other things. I'm babbling because I've spent the last hour writing and the last hours since Sunday trying to improve situations. Sometimes you need to put yourself in a time out. Just stop. Just stop. At the end of the day, its just you.
Arrrgh. This is not a blog I want to write. This is not a blog I want to write because I don't know if my spirit is here and I don't want to use you. Oh wait. This is not a blog I want to write reminds me of the most amazing collaboration ever between two singers. Way back when I thought my life was so complicated (read:teens) there was a song recorded by Madonna and Prince. I want to say the name of the song was Love Song. I don't recall ever hearing it on the radio and I'm not sure if it was on his CD or hers. Let me tell you, mesmerizing. Nevermind that I was truly head over heels in lust with the BOTH of them, their voices together was pun intended music to my ears. I wonder what ever happened to that song?
And that, Dear Readers, is how to blog. To blog is to let your mind take your fingers from key to key. It is at the very least the most refreshing exhalable thing ever. Nevermind that I get to make up words like exhalable...its my poetic licsense.
Speaking of refreshing, I have not had time to write in my personal blog, since my personal life is happening and unlike OTHER PEOPLE (1) WHO WILL REMAIN NAMELESS I have to make time to address issues that effect my life. I have to be selfish. I have to save a little for me. With two children and a Lovely, I have only but so much time for everything else. I make time to write, because this is the time I choose to have for myself. No one can take this away from me.
Alright, enough about me, what about you? What do you love about me? Challah!! Imagine if I was such an attention whore to assume that everyone's life revolves around me. You know, children believe that everything revolves around them, but unfortunately, some adults have trouble letting go of that process. You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you, whoa...that lyric has spoken to me time and time again. I wish it could be my ringtone sometimes.
Ugh, I just recieved a phone call...briiiiiing briiiiiiing life and responsibility calling....unfortunately I can't put this on hold. Thank you for understanding, and I look forward to speaking to you again. Really, the phone is ringing. Don't miss the call.
You get me, that's why I love you.
Lola
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