Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Like If You Plunge

Dear Readers:

I was not going to write tonight, as I have sustained an injury. For the past 21 minutes I have been futilely trying to unclog the toilet. My poor blogging hands are calloused and I speak to you tonight in pain. Yeah.

Here is the thing...I had a conversation with a friend recently and she groused about how the ONLY time she ever had to unclog her toilet is when children were in her home. At the time, I thought the conversation to be funny, but now....

I am disgusted to agree. The only damn time I touch that plunger is when the CHILDREN (mine and yours) clog the toilet. I don't know why or how. I just don't get it. I do really think that if I were childless, I would not even need a plunger.

With that being said, here is a list of things that I would not need if I were childless, in no particular order:

1. Locks on the doors
2. Ice Tea Mix
3. Pink Toothpaste with sparkly things
4. Two cable boxes
5. Peroxide
6. Excedrin Tension Headache
7. Hiding places for my "stuff"
8. PC passwords
9. A two bedroom apartment (that I freaking pay for and clean)
10. Pajamas

I did not add in the plunger, because we already touched on that. I kind of got stuck around #8, to the point that I was looking around for inspiration. As I look at that list, it is accurate. I'm sure that I can add more, but do we really want to depress me more.

Parenting is exhausting and I love my WondaKids anyway. Parenting in not for everyone. I can't say what one would need to be a great parent, but you sure as hell better know how to handle a plunger.

It's late, my hands are calloused and THE FREAKING TOILET is still clogged. I'm tired so freak it. It will be the last toilet that I unclog this year. Maybe I should keep a log.

Yawn. I had more to say today, but that incident really pissed me off, pun intended.

You get me, that's why I love you.

Lola

Friday, December 17, 2010

Friday Night Blog aka Preemptive Strike!

"A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born."

~Antoine de Saint-Exupery

Ho ho there Dear Readers!

You didn't expect me to open up a blog with a quote, did you? You clearly don't recognize how deep I am. Lol! A very, very, very, great, beautiful brown friend of mine shared her favorite book with me, The Little Prince, by Antoine de Saint-Exupery. That opening quote is from Antoine, or as I like to call him, Tone. Tone has a very interesting story and I'd urge you to read all about him, but what you really should read is The Little Prince.

It is a children's tale, but I feel that is a children's tale for adults who need to be reminded of what life really is all about. I feel like I should open up a tab and just start swiping quotes from the book. The quote above is not from The Little Prince, by the way.

My friend was so kind to share the book with me, as she felt that I needed it. She was right. She is really that deep. Though I think she would have been fine with me keeping the book, I gave it back....for another dear friend who may need it.

I almost think that it should be required reading for adulthood. Oh wait...two facebook notifications...be right back....ahhhhh technology.....now that was funny. By the time I clicked over, there were four; two from friends and two from Henrietta Hudson's. Apparently the event that I will probably attend next week has had a name change, as if I committed the name of the event to memory.

Back to The Little Prince. I say that I do this for you, but I'm doing it for me, assuming that it will do great things for you. I am going to open a tab and snatch some quotes. How's that? A little different twist, I mean...this is a Friday blog. You don't know the next time you will get this opportunity, to hear from me on a Friday. I had plans this evening, but my dique chest cold preempted everything.

"Grown-ups never understand anything by themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them."

How great is that? As adults we seem to think that we are the end all. If we don't know something, another adult will. Kids can explain anything. If I held true today at least half the stuff I believed as a 4th grader, I'd be better off.

"I should never have listened to her," he confided to me one day, "One should never listen to the flowers. One should simply look at them and breathe their fragrance."

Now...check that out. Stop and smell the roses...BUT don't pick them! Ok, this quote is about more than flowers. The gist is, you can enjoy something without needing to make it yours or decide that everything that comes from it is gospel. Especially if you are down with OPP. LMAO LMFAO...what an adult thought. Erase, erase, erase. I could not resist, sorry.

"Language is the source of misunderstandings."

Say word. The words that you use, along with the way you express them can mean so much. The ish is, you cannot expect everyone to get your meaning as well as you do. What does that mean..shut up. No...think, think long and hard before you speak and if something can be demonstrated without the weight of language, than let that demonstration be your voice. Check me out...this flu virus is really working me.

"You're beautiful, but you're empty.... No one could die for you."

Ok. That one really makes me think. I wondered if someone would say that about me, or if I've ever known anyone to say it to. I honestly do not believe that anyone would die for me. I am speaking figuravitily of course. I don't see anyone really sacrificing for me. I don't know how to feel about that. I think that takes a lot of stress off of me. If no one is willing for me, then I don't have to be concerned with returning the favor.

"What makes the desert beautiful," says the little prince, "is that somewhere it hides a well."

Sigh. Words are not necessary..just read and sigh....there is hope everywhere.

There are more amazing quotes, but I really urge you to read the book for yourself. So that I don't have to feel some kind of way by copying all the quotes, I'll do the late great Tone a favor....

Amazon.com has The Little Prince in stock for $7.98. I'd order one right now, but I'll be at B&N tomorrow and pick up my own copy.

I'd like to close this post by welcoming two new Dear Readers...you know who you are, I'm glad that you've come.

You get me, that's why I love you.


Lola

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

It's Tuesday

Hello Dear Readers:

Crickets? I don't even know. You guys HAVE NO CLUE, or maybe some of you do, as to what I have been going through. I didn't even take a second to read the last blog, so I don't know what I said. Though all my blogs count, I am so sure that my life is changing so fast...you ought to just follow from this point on.

There is going to be an unveiling of a whole new Lola. The way I feel lately, I might just start using my government name. I hardly know who I am. That's not why you are here though. How are you? How are the holidays treating you?

I'm not involved with holidays this year. To be perfectly honest, I'm really to busy with work, school and life in general to be bothered with holidays.

The greatest thing about the holidays is that they resurface once a year. It makes me feel good that I have next year to get all mushy and ish. Right now...freak that crap.

It's been so long since we have spoken. I feel like I should just share my FB with you as that is where I post all the happenings. I'm sorry about that. Its just that my FB is so handy. To blog to you, I have to go through a whole process. And...FB is great because folk reach out to me in response. I am not as an attention whore as I used to be, but I still do enjoy a little credit.

Recently someone posted something on FB that sounded like one of my words. I don't remember what the word was, but I was concerned...so I FB'd the someone and bluntly asked if they were using my words. What kind of answer do you think that I got? Yes, those were your words, you are the most high in the sky like the stars, crystal gel....? No. Instead, I got a compliment (?) I guess, because the person said that my way of expressing myself was so interesting. Uh yeah. Wait one sec...lemme see brb....ok. That didn't work. I went to FB because I was going to cut and paste the comments here. Apparently, that is not ok with the powers that be.

See, that's kind of sucky because now you miss out when the guy on the bus sat on me. You just can't tell that type of story more than a few times.

Did I tell you that I'm teaching high school? I had too, I'm almost sure, because that was one of my lame ass excuses for not blogging. Trust me, that is not a lame ass excuse. I have a whole pile of papers that I am ignoring, knowing DAMN well that I should be grading.

I just don't feel like doing anything but this. I feel so good when I blog. This could be my utopia. I have greater plans for utopia, well at least I did. My plans didn't exactly go as planned. I guess that doesn't make them plans.

Moving right along. So....what do you want for Christmas? I need red pens. I need red pens, because maybe that will inspire me to grade these dang papers. I wish my students would just email me their work. I would be so much better at grading.

I'm watching 16 & Pregnant, rather it is watching me. After a few episodes, all these stories sound alike. I don't know why I bother. It is freezing in here and I am too lazy to go get my hoodie.

Won't you come on by and get my hoodie out of the closet? I don't have anyone to do coolio things like that for me. Life is good when you have someone that can run into the kitchen and make you tea, life is fabulous when you have someone to bring you your hoodie from the closet.

I wish I had that.

I wish I had loads of things...but if someone truly wanted to get me what I wanted for Christmas, I'd like someone who would love me enough to get my hoodie from the closet, bonus points if they could rub Vicks on my chest without making a face.

That is love.

This is enough as I have not touched any important subjects..this was like a slam blog. I'm sorry it lacks direction, but its late, I'm tired, congested and cold and this silly heifer on 16 & Pregnant is mad because Blake has not been home and Nathan is intense.

W/h/a/t/e/v/e/r.

I love you for reading, (<---is that even my sign off? I don't recall)

Lola

WAIT!

You get me, that's why I love you!

Lola!!

Monday, October 25, 2010

It has been nearly two months since my last confession....

Readers, dear Readers:
I am blogging after midnight from my touch. There will be errors and I lack the energy to correct them. I love you and I miss you and I'M TEACHING AND THAT SUCKS THE EVERYTHING OUT OF ME. Sorry for the yelling but I've been meaning to get around to this for some time now, need I remind you why I've been so absent? This is not a comfy way of blogging but hopefully you realize how much I truly miss you with this glorified text message. You must have loads of questions and I swear that I have answers but I'm too best to read your mind right now. I have to sleep but please understand you are loved. I am ok just hella busy. This is not goodbye......but we will pick up this chat later!

Lola losing sleep, send love please

Saturday, September 4, 2010

I've lost count...would someone be so kind...

Dear Readers:

Aren't you patient? I told you that I took on something new and I did. I switched careers and while I don't want to go into it right now, I've been hired and work starts next week.

I am very excited, though more so nervous. Today has been an emotional day, as I've been choking back tears all day. There is so much going on. Never have I felt so lonely. Well, maybe I have-its just been so long.

Loneliness is a funny thing, especially when you forget the empty feeling. The nutty thing is that I want to be alone, just not with myself. That is crazy talk. I need this, I need to just bang away at the keys and the hell with proofreading, spell check and the like.

This turmoil has little to do with my new career. It is more about my life and choices. I mean, this is the only life that I have. I should not be second guessing, I should not wake up full of tears. I dreamt of my Grandma last night. She has this uncanny way of coming to me when I am especially upset. I love her so much. As much as we argued, she is the ONLY person who has understood me. Ever. I tell you all the time that you get me, but what you get is what I portray. There are pieces of me that will forever be just for me. Sometimes I just think too much. I mean, staying under the radar can get awfully comfy..but come up for air once or twice......

You will be shocked at what has been going on, outside of your safe zone. Oh Dear Readers, what to do? Your Lola is in pain. I feel stained and ruined. I don't want this. I just want what I had. I don't know if I can get it back. Quite possibly what I had is coming to an end. Maybe it ended already and I was just too stupid to notice. That is the trouble with seeing the good in everything, sometimes you miss the jagged edge.

I'm so lonely.

I can't even cry right because the WondaKids are milling about. I try not to cry in front of them. Its tough, because I end up living lies everywhere. I may be honest with you, but what does that solve?

Perhaps there is no solution for this problem. I just want to go off by myself. I need to let all this darkness out. This dark, inky, sadness that is weighing me down.

As if I am not heavy enough in real time, I am emotionally weighed down.

This is terrible. I have not spoken to you in over a month and this is what I come back with. If I recall, my last blog was not too hopeful either.

I need someone to hear me. Even if that someone needs to curse me out. I am not looking for sympathy, I'm looking for an ear. In my dreams, my Grandma never speaks to me, but we communicate. That is one of the things that I miss the most, right after her hugs...her voice. It KILLS me that I cannot hear her voice anymore. I don't remember it.

I try.
I swear I do.

That is the worse feeling. So now here are the tears. This is certainly not what you signed up for.

I am so, so, so, sorry.

This is not what I want this blog to be. Please respect that I am a person just like you. I'm feeling a certain way. Though I don't know that anyone will be reading, it feels good (I guess) to get this out.

This is just scratching the surface. Should I dig deeper, I fear that I will never stop crying.

You get me, that's why I love you,


Lola

Thursday, July 22, 2010

An Apology.....Dear Readers, Please Read....

Dear Readers:

I want you to be aware that I am currently going through some things of a personal nature. That is the only reason that I've been so absent. I miss you and I miss writing, but its hard for me to disconnect from my everyday enough to lie to you. I can't just find some random thing to blog about. Ok. That is an untruth. I can really find random things, but I am going through so much, I feel that I will cheat you. I want to share with you, but the time is not right. I just feel entirely too distracted to be the Lola that you need me to be. If I am going to have to censor myself and not be 100% with you, you will pick it up in my writing.

I don't want to leave you hanging, so you can eliminate the following:

1. Sickness
2. Lovely
3. WondaKids

I would think that those are the main things that you would fear. I am quite healthy and yes, still head over heels with my Lovely, and lastly, the WondaKids are quite wonderful.

All of my turmoil is solely based on me. I set out to do something and though it is not more than I expected, sometimes it seems more than I can handle. I don't know if that makes sense--trust me, I don't think anything over the last summer has made sense. I imagine that positive thinking begets positive outcomes, but I am rapidly getting to a place of unpositivity. I am literally racing away from negative thoughts, but they sure are slick in finding their way back to you, or in this case me.

Please, please, don't give up on me. When I tell you that you mean the world to me, Dear Readers, you really do. I hate neglecting you, that is why I am blogging right now. You may wonder why it took me over a month...really the feat that I have undertaken really does keep me busy. Its not just you, my personal & family life has suffered as a whole.

Now that I am here, I am feeling slightly renewed. My relationship with you, Dear Readers, does sustain me. I missed you. Correction: I miss you. I am not going to make promises of my return. I can assure you that I will be back, I just can't promise you a date.

Everyday, whether I am aware of it or not, a little bit of me wishes I was in front of my pc typing away to you.

Thank you for your understanding.

You get me. That's why I love you.

Lola

Thursday, June 17, 2010

I came all the way back just to name this blog..wth...Lola cares, especially on a Thursday that somewhere could be a Tuesday.

Dearest Readers:

I'm well aware that the last time we spoke it was May 25. Yes, it is June 17. Where have I been, you ask? In my skin. My busy, preoccupied, running to and fro skin. I don't even have the capacity to really give you anything of substance tonight. This is like when you check up on your Sim and just go click on the important stuff; food, bathroom, clean the toilet, shower, clean the shower, sleep...I guess, right? Well Dear Readers, I've been pretty busy of late and I have so much to tell you, yet so much to keep to myself. Don't be cross! I have to leave a little for myself. I am the center of my Venn Diagram and though you are here with me, I need some space for me. I swear I hear your eyes rolling. Readers, behave! I'm happy to announce a new Dear Reader out there. Don't worry I won't expose you. I try, somewhat unsuccessfully to keep my identity secret, so trust me I will do the same for you. Only successfully.

OMG. My ipod WON'T DIE. My Lovely was so kind to get me an ipod touch. I really love it, but...this morning I had 20% battery power left. Now, I'm no mathlete..heh heh, but I know 20% is a fifth and that is not much in terms of anything. Imagine a fifth of an M&M! Anyhow, I don't want my new toy to die on me, but I know that I have to let the battery completely deplete before I charge. Dear Readers..when we last left our heroine, her battery was on 20%. She has been running the "dique" dying battery non-stop since 4:30pm. What the hell!!?? Now I cannot even go to bed until it dies and I charge it. No puedo. I am exhausted. I'm starting to think its somehow managed to charge itself. In case you don't know its already 11pm, and I have sooooo much to do, like not blog tomorrow.

Awwww, you guys....I wish we could all meet at Pride. Anonymously of course. I know that there is a killer out there and To Whom It May Concern, don't even try to back me into a corner. Lola don't play that. I love my life very much and I'm in no desire to find myself on the verb side of a chainsaw. I know you are probably surprised. Whatever.

Let's not talk to the killer anymore...they kill for attention, you know. I'd love to tell you what's on my ipod, but I almost fear talking about it will further the battery charge.

I'm sleepy. Gosh. Gone are the days when I would head out to a party at 10pm. Now I'm at the party by 8pm with my early exit strategy already mapped out. What I should do is hop in the shower. Walking though my city in flip flops in the summer is dirty. Ick. On my way to my destination (don't you wish you knew) I walked across some berries. How did I find a patch of berries on a city sidewalk? That's just me. Do you know what happens when you walk across berries in flip flops? It is so not pretty. Ah..just to update you, I just checked the ipod battery. The freaker is on 15%. I've only killed 5%?? Enough. I just powered it off. At this rate it will last me all night and I'm not up for that.

Be right back...mmmm I felt like a snack, so I went to my top secret Hershey kiss stash. Despite me reaching out to you at least monthly, I know that you won't come over so its safe to tell you. I hide the kisses in the freezer behind the baking soda. Lolatiscally, no one EVER looks behind the baking soda in the freezer.

I challenge you to try that out.

Ick. I'm going to go wash the filth of the city off my feet. Its going to take me ages to figure out how to clean off these berry stains.


You get me. That's why I love you.


Love

Lola

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

62, 63, 64, 65th Tuesday-At Least Its Tuesday!

Dearest Readers:

I.HAVE.SO.MUCH.GOING.ON.

Where do we start? I'm so busy, I think I have to break off topics and then address them. Isn't that something? Who do I really think I am? Me! Lol! Here we go, I present to you TOPICS OF BLOGSION:

1. JOURNEY TO MEAT/POULTRY FREEDOM
2. CABLEVISION UPDATE AND WHY THEY WILL ALWAYS SUCK
3. GREATEST BOOK I'VE READ THIS YEAR
4. GYM UPDATE & VROOM VROOM UPDATE AKA SHORTEST UPDATE EVER
5. WHAT I DID THIS PAST SATURDAY
6. FUZZY CREATURE FEATURE
7. OVEN: TO BAKE OR NOT TO BAKE THAT IS THE QUESTION
8. MY BOOK: WHY I CANNOT WRITE SMALL ENOUGH
9. GREATEST MOMENTS ON APRIL 30, 2010
10: MY BOOK PART II: WHY ARE TEN DAYS ALREADY FILLED IN?
11: CRYING IN MY SMOOTHIE: THE LOLA-ALL-ALONE PERIODICAL

I'm pretty sure that I can combine a few topics, but please, indulge me...I have not been around for a bit.

JOURNEY TO MEAT/POULTRY FREEDOM
Today marks one month and one day that I have been meat and poultry free. I am actually ok. I didn't think it would be so tough, seeing as I enjoy an eclectic diet anyway. I guess I was worried because I am a foodie (read: fat a$$). I do not really feel a huge difference in my body. I'd like to say I feel more energetic, but to say that today would be a LIE, since I am exhausted. You may be wondering how the vegetarian life is...well, I don't know. I am not a vegetarian. Its a popular misconception. Vegetarians don't eat seafood. You know, nothing with a face. I'm a PESCATARIAN. Yes I am well aware that that sounds like a religion. Spare me. I've had a few moments where I felt tempted, but the hardest moments: coming across a paper bag of fried chicken and lifting the foil on a HUGE pernil. The first incident FCPB was at a friend's home. She sent me in the kitchen to get a bag of tortilla chips out of a bag. Don't ask me why this dique friend had a similar looking paper bag on the same table with a bag of chicken wings staring at me. Readers, those chicken wings looked so awesome, its like they were waiting for me. I stood there stuck for a minute until I clenched my fists and walked away. The second incident, the PERNIL ASSAULT was recently at my mother's home. I was snacking on a big bag of trail mix and my mom called my attention to a pan in her kitchen. I of course, assumed it was chicken and since I already beat the chicken lust, I opened it without hesitation. There in front of me, still warm, fresh garlic and herbs glistening was quite possibly the sexiest pork shoulder I'd EVER seen. For some reason its real easy to say "no pork on my fork, no swine on my mind" when you think of pork, UNTIL you come across the SEXIEST PERNIL OF ALL TIME. Be proud of me, I tossed in a extra big handful of pumpkin seeds and raisins and walked away.


CABLEVISION UPDATE AND WHY THEY WILL ALWAYS SUCK
I pride myself on beating the system when it comes to Cablevision. I think that they are way too expensive and all they do is show the same crap. I used to have a huge diamond platinum pimp package with more channels then I would ever need. From there I went to no cable, no phone, no internet...my bills was so tiny, it was like a late night bodega trip. After a while, I really had to up the package, it was depressing. I figured since it was winter-we didn't have too many out-of-the-house options. At this point, due to TOP SECRET DEVELOPMENTS, I need to up it once again-this time to add a phone line and the internet. DUM DUM DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA yes the internet. You ought to be excited, because that means more blogging. Wooooweeee. I didn't forget the suckation: they suck because they have a Triple Play, one year $30 a service..so for the cable, phone and internet plus taxes and lies (taxes=lies) the bill will be a few blocks over $100. Watch What Happens!!! Once you get all used to the beauty of simultaneously chatting on the phone, blogging and watching Bravo, they send you the REAL BILL. The plan should be called Triple Play and PleaseGetThatKnifeOutOfMyBackThankYouVeryMuch. Hopefully the TOP SECRET DEVELOPMENTS will dull the knife. TBA.

GREATEST BOOK I'VE READ THIS YEAR

The Host by Stephanie Meyers. Yes, she has written something other than the Twilight Series. No, there are no dang vampyres or wolves in this one, but WOW. What a story! What a concept! I would be in such a better place right now, if I would have written that. But nooooooooo, I spend all my time blogging to My Dear Readers and working on TOP SECRET DEVELOPMENTS. It's all good. I won't tell you anything about the book, I mean, unless you really enjoy a FABULOUS read, its not for you. You know what, now that I think about it, this blog should fill all your requirements for reading, but should I get too preoccupied with TOP SECRET DEVELOPMENTS, you are more than free to explore other reading options, starting with The Host.


GYM UPDATE & VROOM VROOM UPDATE AKA SHORTEST UPDATE EVER

NO AND NO. FIN.

WHAT I DID THIS PAST SATURDAY

Saturday morning McKinley and I went to a bone marrow drive for Sophia Lopez. It took minutes of my life, to possibly save hers. Here is the site for more information: http://www.dkmsamericas.org/drives/help-save-baby-sophia-and-others-0
Readers, I'm all for a cause. I took my WondaGirl because I hope to instill the same values in my children. Patterson went to a Math Tournament...I know, he a freaking genius. Really, take a look at Sophia's page. It only takes a minute. After that feel good trip, we went to meet a friend, the FCPB friend..only this time she didn't leave any poultry around. We had a fantastic time at the Bronx Zoo. My friend, her two kids and three extra kids..plus me and McKinley. My friend is a SAINT. She really is. She has a yearly membership to the Zoo which includes loads of goodies at all the NYC Zoos and even the Aquarium. Ah, don't take it from me, look here http://www.bronxzoo.com/. Good Times....

FUZZY CREATURE FEATURE

Wow. I am feeling tired. I will plow on. Alright, so I know that I live in NY, and I understand that we have rat issues. Ewwwww..did you happen to catch that commercial..something about budget cuts--all I know is it talks about the new neighbors and the camera is thisclose on no less than a housing project worth of rodents. Ewww...worst that the cancerous lung anti smoking ad. Anyhow, I've been seeing signs, OBVIOUS ones indicating that I may have more than the average mice. I saw them working their way, one by one (it was three) to a secret location under my radiator. I put down some traps and caught two. Well you don't have to follow Sesame Street to understand that I SHOULD have had one left. Flash forward to a week later and I have fourteen (14) dropping left overnight in my kitchen. Do you know how disgusting it is to have to count and recount droppings. Really, I can't deal with that much excitement at 6am. I called the folk that beat the rent out of me every month and left a scalding (not scolding, SCALDING) voicemail. They sent two exterminators, who pretty much tore up my entire home, stuffing every hole with poison and steel wool. So far, I have not seen any dropping-I did see one mouse mid week. I think he is probably afraid to leave droppings, since my reaction was so scalding. Yes I said it again. I like the way it rolls out.

OVEN: TO BAKE OR NOT TO BAKE THAT IS THE QUESTION

This one is easy. I can bake. The reason I couldn't bake is because apparently that wire hanging in my oven was supposed to be there and a certain blogger who will remained unnamed should not have snapped it off in a moment of fury.

MY BOOK: WHY I CANNOT WRITE SMALL ENOUGH

Lately there has been some question as to why I keep talking about my book. No, I am not writing a book. I am talking about my calendar book. Due to the TOP SECRET DEVELOPMENTS, I have so many deadlines and ish to do, that I have no choice but to write it down. Since my book is the Hallmark freebie, it is really small. If you were to look at my book, you'd think, WOW...THIS LOLA, I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE SETS TIME ASIDE TO EAT, MUCH LESS BLOG, POOR CREATURE.

GREATEST MOMENT ON APRIL 30, 2010

On April 30, 2010 a dream of mine came to fruition at about 2:15. Yes it has to do with the TOP SECRET DEVELOPMENTS. I promise to share with you during the week of June 21st. I promise the time is flying by! Fruition is probably the wrong word, but lets just say that I needed the NEWS for the dream to even JOURNEY TO FRUITION.

MY BOOK PART II: WHY ARE TEN DAYS ALREADY FILLED IN?

See above. Count all the TOP SECRET DEVELOPMENTS. That'll learn ya.

CRYING IN MY SMOOTHIE: THE LOLA-ALL-ALONE PERIODICAL

Since I'm a little paranoid, I'm not telling you when but somewhere during the month of July My Lovely will be vacationing without me and I will be a damn mess. I don't know that I will be able to do anything without promise of her arms around me. Argh. No puedo. I love her. Baby, I love you, I miss you already. I can't want until you come home. Mind you, Readers, she has not even left. I try to prepare myself for these things. Otherwise-straight basket case. McKinley and Patterson will be gone during the same period. No, not with her...loca! It will just be me dolo. Alright, alright...According to the Urban Dictionary: Dolo is a slang expression - Means To be alone, by yourself. I heard it, I think, when I was watching Step Brothers. Maybe. I don't know.

Oh! The same day that I watched Step Brothers, I watched Teeth. What!!?? I will leave you with a quote from the movie.

"Vagina dentata! It's what's inside me. The doctor said so. A hero has to come and conquer them!"

You get me, that's why I love you.


Lola

Whew. This was a long one. Stand, deliver and we all fall down.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Numberless Blog: AIDS Walk Info....

Please sponsor me for AIDS Walk New York!


Hey!

I'm going to walk to raise money on May 16, 2010.  I don't want to fill your head with all the statistics.  Unless you've lived under a rock for the past 25 years, you know that AIDS is an epidemic.  Yes, I said epidemic!  It has not gone anywhere.  You may just hear about it once a year, but trust me.  Google AIDS, and see what you've missed.
 
I appreciate your help.  If you need assistance with the link below or any questions at all, please feel free to contact me. If I don't have an answer right away, I'll be sure to get back to you.  If you need to respond to this blog, please put AIDS WALK in the subject line, so that I can give your note immediate attention. 

Thank you for supporting AIDS Walk New York and for helping to put an end to this epidemic.


Follow This Link to visit my personal web page and help me in my efforts to support AIDS Walk New York

******************************************************************************
Some email systems do not support the use of links and therefore this link may not appear to work. If so, copy and paste the following into your browser:
http://aidswalknewyork2010.kintera.org/faf/r.asp?t=4&i=331281&u=331281-289863810&e=3344449883
******************************************************************************

Lola

61st Tuesday/Monday Cloaked in the Mystery of Tuesday

Dear Readers,

Dearest Readers,

Dearest Most Greatest Readers,

However it suits you, its for you. Dear New Subscribers, Latina and Besos0115, thank you for subscribing. I must say, it was quite thrilling to sign on today and see all the extra icons. I know that there can be anonymous Readers and I love you too, but I commend my public readers (pubic, LOL!, NEVER GETS OLD) for being so out and proud. There is alot to cover today, so I will probably be back and forth. Let's consider this a 8hr blog...seeing as I will be back and forth over the next 8hrs.

LolaDate: 9:16 AM

I like that. First and foremost, I want to extend my sincere condolences to a Dear Reader who suffered a loss quite recently. You know who you are, you are loved, you are prayed for and you know how to reach me.

Oh heart, if one should say to you that the soul perishes like the body, answer that the flower withers, but the seed remains.
Kahlil Gibran

In my opinion, in the face of loss, its perfectly OK to grieve however you feel necessary. I think that you should never count down the days to the end of grieving, rather look forward to the days of laughter and sweet memories. I have never stopped thinking about the people that I have lost, rather they are constantly with me. My love for them is intensified, as it has added to me, as if I have grown from their passing.

I need a moment.

LolaDate: 9:56 AM

I'm baaaaaaaaaaack! OK, next order of business.

http://aidswalknewyork2010.kintera.org/faf/r.asp?t=4&i=331281&u=331281-289863810&e=3344449883

We are walking to raise money for Aids research and so forth on May 16, 2010. Above you will find the link that you can paste into your browser to support this. Now Dear Readers, this is not the first time I've walked for charity, but this is the first time I'm walking as a Blogger. For that reason, I'm asking you to please donate. If not to me, to someone else. If you don't feel like parting with your own money, do one better...raise money and walk. Really, I cannot tell you how great it will feel. I look forward to these walks, and truly if you decide to support me, I will not let you down. I would be HONORED to say the least to walk in the name of my Dear Readers. Even $1 counts. I am always grateful. Now, for the grease. I'm going to look carefully for my Dear Readers on my donation page. I'm so excited. I am not demanding you donate, but the next time you stand on line at McDKingCastleBell, I want you to ask yourself, do you really need that WhopperNuggetBaconTostada or what? I can tell you that you DO NOT. Donate that cash, your body will thank you.

This is a nice way to lead into our next topic which would be MY JOURNEY INTO A MEAT FREE LIFE. Yes. I am going for it. I started yesterday. I am really trying to eliminate meat from my life. Alright, I have yet to watch Food, Inc and I swear its on my agenda, but I already know that meat is not the best for my body. Here are the reasons, besides the fact that My Lovely has given it up......

1. There is no medical evidence that I NEED to consume red meat or even poultry to live a happy, healthy life.
2. There are soooo many meat and poultry free meals to enjoy.
3. As an animal lover, I feel like a PHONY when I chow down on creatures that were treated inhumanly.
4. This may just work great in my Journey To Size 8.
5. Seafood. Need I say more?

I have loads of reading to do to come up with the right diet. This week I am meat and poultry free, just to see how I like it. I don't intend YET to eliminate poultry, because I love chickens, hens and turkeys. What I did do, was go out and buy chicken that was not feed crap, pumped full of steroids and then slain in the most awful way. I don't know that I can go cold turkey, pun intended, on my feathered friends. I just much rather daydream about the bird on my plate living such a fabulous life that he was actually eager to end up next to my wheat berries and spinach.

I'm also bringing in more organic options to my kitchen. Little by little, I will keep you guys updated. Yesterday for my first day, I ate well and didn't even miss it.

LolaDate: 10:53 AM

I said in my last blog that I would update you on my Cardio Boxing with the Wii. So far, its fine, but honestly I would be remiss if I neglected to mention that I purchased THE GREATEST WORKOUT GAME EVER, JUST DANCE! Whoa. Readers, when I say fun, I mean FUN. I am pretty sure its because I can't really dance, but when I put that game in...it's like American Bandstand for the common blogger. I love it. Not only is it great fun, you (or at least I do) work up a sweat.

I'm looking forward to playing with My Lovely tonight. It feels so good to be in love with someone that you can be an ass with. She is the best. If you are in love with someone that you have to "be" a certain way with, you are wasting your time, not to mention lying. Let me clarify: there are somethings that I know My Lovely likes, so yes, I have made some positive changes in my life--but not to the point that I find impossible. I know that there are things that she would love to see changed, but at the end of the day, I'm still Lola. She loves me for who I am and who I am able to be. Whew. That was almost a disclaimer.

Hey! Besos0115, who are you? I am not asking your identity (maybe) but out of all my Dear Readers that have publicly subscribed, I don't know who you are. You are a creature of mystery, intrigue and I pray not deceit! Anyhow, you know how I am about privacy, so I respect you. I do believe that you must be in my circle of friends, so I will be watching carefully to see if YOU say anything to incriminate yourself. I'm sorry, but ever since I fell off watching Lost, I've been hungry for a mystery.

Thanks for being here.

In other Dear Reader News, it has come to my attention that one of you has shaved your head! I must say that I will miss your locs, but you are so beautiful, I am excited to see you in your updated look. I've seen your hair short before, but I hear that its Short SHORT. Yaaaaa you! I've always been tempted to loc my hair, but I really, truly lack the commitment. As far as going as low as Short SHORT, I'm not there yet. I hope I see you soon, if not in person like God intended, I'd settle for via text....please.

Dear Readers, its 11:09 AM and I think I must go. It's been great catching up and WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, I HAVE NOT STARTED DRIVING SCHOOL YET, NOR HAVE I BEEN BEHIND THE WHEEL, I thought you might be wondering, I'm getting there. Vroom vroom!

You get me, that's why I love you,

Lola

Now I have to run this through editing--what you thought I just wrote and posted all willy-nilly, nope....Lola don't play that.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

58th Tuesday, Ok..its Thursday...

Hello!!!

Vroom! Vroom! Who got the keys to my Beemer? That's right, Dear Readers..I'm officially a Learner! All this good news is supposed to distract you from the fact that we last spoke on March 17. You are like an old friend, even if we don't speak everyday, it's always easy to catch up.

So March 26 was my last day of work. I bet you are trying to guess if I work for a city agency that gets Spring Break. Guess all you want, I've told you before Dear Readers, a killer could be amoung us and I don't want to give too much away. Yet. Heh. Heh.

On my last day of vacation, I set the clock (read: cell phone) nice and early to go the DMV. I called 311 that day to find out if I could obtain my permit at the DMV closest to my home. Yes, yes..Dear Readers, you are all Sherlock Holmes, yes, 311 is the information number in New York, which yes, means that I am a New Yorker. Ok?? Sometimes you seem obsessed. Anyway..311 was a waste because she gave me the wrong information-leading me to the wrong location. From the wrong location I went to the right location, where I was told that I didn't have enough documentation.

Riddle me this: If I had a NYS identification, which I could only obtain with my birth certificate in the first place, why the hell would I need my birth certificate as a form of identification? What kind of chicken before the egg ish is that?

I was going to give up. I'm quite fond of giving up, if you can't gather that from my "weekly" blogging. However I spoke to my very good friend and she gave me a pep talk.

Oh..on the subject of friends which has little/nothing to do with this blog...assuming you all have friends, you know that there are many types of friends, but the two polar opposites are the GoForIt Friend and the WhyBotherAnyway Friend. The GoForIt Friend can see the good in everything and is always in your corner. She is the friend, who though she may be going through her own ish, she won't let her problems pollute her mood to the point that she becomes the WhyBotherAnyway Friend. The WhyBotherAnyway Friend is so deep in her own waaa waaa that she does not have time to give you a pep talk, only the time to get a pep talk from you that in the long run she won't even care about. I think my sentences are kind of run on, but if I am a Friend In Your Head, you should be able to follow me. I am the GoForIt Friend, though sometimes I find myself treading toward WhyBotherAnyway. All I'm saying is, its good that I spoke to my GoForIt on Tuesday because now I

AM A PROUD HOLDER OF A LEARNER'S PERMIT!

I'm really looking forward to driving. That day I went all the way back home, picked up my certificate and carried my arse all the way back. Truly the experience took my whole last day of vacation, but it was such a great way to end vacation. Today I am probably going to go check out a school so I can get on the road.

Beep! Beep!

I'm such a mild person, I can't really imagine using my horn, unless I'm in severe danger. It would be so cool if I could record my horn tone, similar to my cell phone. Then I could say whatever I want in a soothing, pleasing tone.

GOOD MORNING, IT SEEMS LIKE YOU ARE IN A HURRY, PLEASE STAY IN YOUR LANE.

or

OH, HONK IF YOU LOVE JESUS, IS THIS REALLY A TIME TO ADVERTISE YOUR BELIEFS?

or

NICE WEAVE, NOW DON'T YOU THINK YOU SHOULD SPEED UP A BIT, SO I DON'T HAVE TO COUNT THE TRACKS?

What other fabulous things did I accomplish? Oh shoot..I nearly forgot. Over the break I decided to purchase a Wii Fit with a balance board. Alas, it was always sold out, and since I am QUEEN OF PLAN B, I instead went with Gold's Cardio Workout for the Wii. I just picked it up yesterday. So far, so good. I honestly did not expect this much and I'm only on basic training. For some reason, I thought boxing just meant punching at the screen to hit your target. No one told me that I would also have to bounce back and forth. Well. It was a funny sight. If I was not so particular about my secret covert in the darkness never in the light identity, I would post a video. I'm telling you, Dear Readers, funny stuff.

In any case, I'm going to stick to it. I am looking forward to getting home this evening and getting through basic training. Once I earn cash I can buy my mii cute outfits and even a panda bear. Oh shoot! I can even pick different music to work out to and my workout studio. It's going down!

My WondaSon kept telling me to punch like I was in a real fight-duh, like I have any prior experience fighting. I tease that I used to belong to a gang, but that joke gets real old, real fast.

Lawdy is it 10am already? I think its time for me to walk around with a clipboard and look at people.

I will let you know how my training goes....boxing AND driving...Vroom Vroom Pow!

You get me, that's why I love you.

Lola

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

54th Tuesday on a Wednesday Feels So Right

Dear Readers,

Hello! I am so excited that I am actually blogging weekly again. This is my second Wednesday, should have been Tuesday entry! Are you as excited as I am? You should be. You know what? Since you are so reserved about leaving comments, I will just assume that you are very excited.

I thank you for sharing this with me.

Today I spent the better part of the day doing something fabulous. Ready? I love when you are so excited, by the way..its a good look. I am preparing for my LEARNER'S PERMIT. What's with the crickets? I don't drive. I function so well as a passenger that I don't particularly see the urgency. However in light of recent events, mainly my QUEST TO GET TO PATHMARK BEFORE THE END OF THE SALE, I've decided to truly get out of the passenger's seat and behind the wheel. As a passenger who is madly head over heels send a minister mister in love with a driver, I realize that being a driver can be tiring. I want to be able to tell My Lovely to pull over and take the passenger side for once. She can play with the radio, look out the window, read, feed me fries...all that good stuff. I will drive. Ta-dah! I did all the research, did the online quizzes, filled out forms...I even put everything in a folder emblazoned with LOLA DRIVES in Sharpie. Everyone knows that once you write something with a Sharpie it comes true. When I pass the written test on Thursday, I will schedule classes. I am nervous and afraid to drive, but that is of no consequence, because LOLA DRIVES (say it in a strong Sharpie voice).

This is a short blog because I have ALL THIS ENERGY today and I can't bear to sit here much longer. Don't fret, my pet, because I gave you the best part of my day. What else would you like to know? What I wore today? Green, of course. No, I'm not Irish, but green looks good on me and I am sure to have a shot of Jameson Irish Whiskey today for St. Patrick's Day. I'm sure I mentioned to you before that I was born into a Catholic family. Although I don't go to church every Sunday, I do hold one thing true....Catholics will PARTY for anything! So I guess I am Catholic enough to throw back a few in honor of St. Patrick, but when everyone was giving up stuff for Lent, I got all self righteous. Self-righteousness (also called sententiousness, holier-than-thou[1]) is a feeling of smug moral superiority[2] derived from a sense that one's beliefs, actions, or affiliations are of greater virtue than those of the average person.

I know you know the definition, but I could not resist, especially since I'd never seen the term "sententiousness". I'm a word whore.

I didn't give up a thing. I have two children. I give up stuff ALL THE TIME.

Whoa.

It's 3:02. I love you, but I must go. I have to bring my brand of cheer to a relative who underwent surgery today. He is great, of course. I wish him a quick recovery-though that's best done in person, so I will catch up with you, Dear Readers, later on.


You get me, that's why I love you.

Lola aka Vroom Vroom

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

53rd Tuesday Cloaked in Wednesday, Its Evil Cousin

Good Morning!

How is everyone today? I have a band aid on my finger so I am typing a little kooky. If you see a typo, don't persecute me. Well you can, if its fun and harmless. I don't know how much of me I can afford to give you today, my staff is especially chatty. I don't know what's in the air, I guess Spring. Whatever man, I just want the end of the month to get here so I can have yet another week off. This job is sweet.

Did I tell you about my fabulous birthday weekend? When last we spoke, I told you it was coming up. On Friday, My Lovely took me to Don Coqui. YumTASTIC! I could go on and on about the service and presentation, but unless you are a foodie like me, you only care about the actual grub. We started with plantain crusted crab legs. For entrees, she had plantain crusted salmon and smashed yuca and I had oxtails and white rice with avocado. The food was so good, I barely remember what we had for drinks. My only regret with the oxtails, is that Don Coqui is not the type of place where you can suck the bones. I mean, with oxtails, you really have to get in there! You must annihilate the bone! There I was in this glamorous place with these delicious fatty oxtails and I was using a damn butter knife to gently coerce the meat off the bones. Mmmmmmmmmm. I imagine that there must be some hungry guy in the kitchen who sucks off all the old tails. Alright, that was a bit much, but damn they were good.

When we got home, we got home. Alright?? Don't start none, won't be none.

The next morning we had to get ready for my birthday dinner. I'll skip all the details, but once again...the menu counts....for the first time in my life history I had a BBQ for my birthday! Yes, grill and the whole nine. It was so much fun. I thank everyone that came, which was everyone that was invited. How often does that happen? We had so much fun. My Lovely really made my BBQ dinner spectacular. I've never loved February like I love it now that she is in my life.

On Sunday, my actual birthday, we stayed in. I pretty much vegged all day. She cleaned up from the night before. This is the time when I mention that a guest to my party makes a special drink..it was fabulous, however, this guest has a bear like grip and FOR THE LIFE OF US, we could not twist the top off the beverage container to wash it. I must remark that it had nothing to do with staying up late the night before--I'm no weakling, neither is My Lovely. Even after changing colors trying to open it, her dad had to COME ALL THE WAY FROM FLORIDA to get it open. Alright, he didn't actually come all the way from Florida to open it, but he did come all the way from Florida and open it. After My Lovely cleaned everything up, we ordered food, seeing as the menu from my party was so yumTASTIC, there weren't any leftovers. Thanks again to everyone that came.

This past weekend I celebrated my sister's 30th birthday. I had misgivings, seeing as My Lovely was not coming, I didn't expect to have so much fun. I'm so glad I was wrong. On Friday we went to dinner at Cuba on Thompson Street. Did you hear about the fire? That was us. Yep. My sister's best friend gave her a gift that was bedazzled with tissue paper and the damn paper caught a little spark from one of the candles and THAT IS HOW WE NEARLY BURNT DOWN CUBA. There were six of us, counting my sister. Onset of the fire, you could totally see our personalities based on our reaction. Two kind of looked at the fire in awe, one got up and doused it with water, one grabbed her weave with one hand and fanned with the other hand, one GRABBED HER GIFTS AND NEARLY LET THE FIRE consume her best friend, and I got up with the bill and my phone and calmly informed the waiter that there was a fire at our table.

Long story short (as if I could condense anything) the staff was very nice even though we nearly charred the white sofa.

On Saturday we all went to Volstead for the BIG PARTY. Fun, fun, fun and more fun. I even had the insight to make a call when I got home safely, something I neglected to do on Friday, because Dear Readers, I can be a jerk. At Volstead, we drank, ate and danced. My sister's oldest childhood friend came and we were all weepy and crap. What a bunch of pansies! I love us. There are loads of pictures of both events on Facebook that the majority of you will never see BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW ME! LOL!

On Sunday My Lovely, her Lovely Parents, her Work Wife, McKinley and I went to see Alice in Wonderland. Awesome! Awesome was the movie and even more awesome were My Lovely's Workwife's boots. She'd been dating them for a while and finally went to buy them. They are very time consuming like a difficult relationship, but a relationship with someone who rocks your world just right so they are SO worth the difficulty.

This blog is reading more like a journal and if this is not what you paid for, I'm sorry. Oh wait. You don't pay for this. You just mosey on down here and read if you feel like it. I don't force you. I will leave you with a conversation I had with my mother on my birthday. What you thought that I was a motherless chile?

Ma: Oh. Happy Birthday. Its so nice that you actually answered the phone.

Me: Hi Ma. Thank you.

Ma: So. Are you enjoying your day?

Me: Mmmhmm

Silence.

Me: What did you do today, Ma? Are you enjoying your day?

Ma: I went to church...

Me: Oh that's great...

Ma: ...to pray for the sinners.

Me: Ah. How'd that work for you?

At that point I rushed her off the phone. My man...is that what you do to commemorate the birth of your oldest? I wonder if I was in her prayers? Probably.

You get me, that's why I love you.


Lola

Thursday, February 25, 2010

51st Tuesday - Though I Barely Trust Me

Dear Readers:

I hardly know where to begin. I have to say, I do not have the internet at home, nor am I having much luck stealing a signal anymore. That is a poor excuse for being so sporadic, but truly...this is a weekly blog and I will pay more attention. Even if it means blogging at work more often (during my lunch of course, because I wouldn't DREAM of blogging during work, otherwise) or even at My Lovely's home.

I don't mean for this to look like a monthly blog. I really do love you guys, and I apologize. Today was the first time I was even able to view my last blog online, if you read it, than you know I did it on my FABULOUS NEW PHONE, while in the mountains.

I want to welcome back my Dear Readers, plus I'd like to welcome new ones. Dear New Reader, you know who you are--I'm sorry FB was being a real hole. Each time I tried to inbox my blog address, it asks me to complete one of those ridiculous TYPE THIS TO PROVE YOU ARE NOT A HACKER OR TELEMARKETER BULLCRAP, and then when I complied, I got some dang OTHER MEMBERS HAVE REPORTED THIS POST AS ABUSIVE. I don't know who did that and honestly I cannot spend anymore time on this, my Dear Readers may get restless with such talk. In any case, thanks for asking for my address, I hope you enjoy. If this is the first blog that you are reading, you may enjoy reading them in chronological order.

Ok. Enough of that. Dear Readers, as this month comes to an end, I'd like to call your attention to March 1, 2010. March 1, 2010 is the day after my 34th birthday. Please don't bellyache that I didn't tell you. Did I mention one of my Dear Readers, the really intelligent grad who recently started a great blog...has moved on to greater things, and I wish her well. Were you guys able to check out her blog? My name is Lola and I approve of this endorsement. I crack myself up, good thing because I cannot expect everyone else to.

HERE IS SOMETHING YOU DON'T NEED TO RETAIN BECAUSE ITS MEANINGLESS right now, I opened a Twitter. Before you start..yes, I know Facebook, My New Fabulous Phone and My Lack of Internet Access at Home has only taken me away from my Dear Readers, and YES I am aware that I don't have time to commit to something else. I do bite off more than I can chew, figuratively and literally, but I only started it to follow Tweets. I don't necessarily want to Tweet, but you know me well. Just to prove that I mean well, I only signed up the other night, and I have yet to do anything but one lousy little sentence. I didn't even mention it to My Lovely, that is how UNNECESSARY this information is. The amount of characters you are allocated are way to little for my thoughts. Imagine me tweeting an entire blog..I'd probably be fined by some group that's so important and selective that they only go by their initials.

Let's move on. LOL. I feel sooooo distracted today. This is what happens when I don't speak to you weekly. I have so much to say, so little time to say it in. Thank you for the Day After My Birthday wishes, I know I will feel the good vibes being sent my way. Of course this is another opportunity for you to send me lavish gifts. I'm proud to report that my Christmas List was pretty much fulfilled. I was so happy, I am still very happy. Special thanks to the following: My Lovely, Her Lovely Parents, a Dear Mentor, and a Dear Friend (Mama of the Cutest Lil Fantastic)for reading my blog and making this Christmas so great. I can't believe I actually got stuff from my list.

I was going to use this blog to write a nice Day After My Birthday Wishlist, but really, who the hell am I? I appreciate you for reading, that's good enough. Sometimes I fear that my persona online is going to take away from Lola Live, and there is a good reason for that. If I were to sit down and really take time to think of my favorite activities, the majority of them have to do with being somewhere in cyberspace. I like to think of myself as a relatively interesting person, but I think I'm getting to a place where I have to prioritize. I know this sounds like responsibility rearing its ugly head, but humor me for a second. I LOVE blogging, Facebook posting, texting and emailing. I am the type of person that has always preferred expressing myself through my writing, so the way the world is today is a great thing, however it could also be a disaster for me.

Anyone that has known for 10+ years would say that I was a quiet, reserved, shy person...back then. I never felt comfortable speaking up, I preferred to blend into the background. I always hid behind something, glasses, books, hair, weight...I was always hiding. My writing gave me a voice, but I still kept my thoughts (and my writings) to myself. As I matured, I would toe the line and share very little with teachers, who in turn would encourage me to do more. My first computer was in my 20's and there I found "friends" online. This was great, because I could be whomever I wanted. From there I found the Sims...where I could create whole families and relationships-something that I kind of lacked growing up.

Is this too heady for you? I'm sorry...I'm in a reflective mood-I think due to the Day After My Birthday. Where were we? The Sims took up so much of my time that I only left the computer go to work. I barely slept and took all of my meals in front of the pc. I guess I was not that hooked to the computer, because during this time I managed to get pregnant. Anyway...shortly thereafter I found something new that made me so happy...I fell in love with women and realized my true calling-Lesbian Extraordinaire. Lol! Actually, that realization pulled me further out of my shell...into happiness. I'm dragging. Sorry. I was ok for a while, but when I realized I was lacking something--I was not making time to write. I found MySpace (laugh if you want) and that worked for a while...plus the Sims. Don't forget the Sims. Eventually, I ended up on Facebook and eventually here.

Its almost to the point that I roll my eyes when the phone rings. Don't get me wrong, I am a people person, but sometimes I feel like I could revert back to my inner JD Salinger, and I don't want to do that.

I say all this to say, that as much as my true joy is writing, I cannot forget to interact in live time.

I will have loads of live time this weekend as My Lovely has a fabulous birthday planned for me. I actually have to have a little live time now, so we will speak soon.

I promise.

You get me, that's why I love you,

Lola

Monday, February 8, 2010

Greetings Dear Readers. Before I go any further, you should know that this blog is so short, it can't even rival a FB status update. The only reason for this mini blog is the fact that I'm doing it from my new phone. Blogging from a phone seems so wrong-like if Twitter was personified, it would be hella pissed. I have so much to say but I don't know if I have the thumb or battery power. My awesome new phone is a touch screen and has a full qwerty pad, but my fingers don't feel comfy enough to go that way or at least blog that way. Omg! I'm in a public place also occupied by a huge group of kids and their parents. They are so loud that my entire person feels molested. I'm not going to turn my blog into a bitch about forum, but be assured that if I wanted to, I have more than enough material. Readers, please be aware that this method of blogging leaves loads of space for error and no space for bells and whistles. If that's what you have the taste for, have a little bite and be on your merry way. NEWS: I signed up for Bikram Yoga and went three times! I only tried the one week trial. For my Dear Readers that are unaware bikram yoga is about 26 poses done in high tempertures, OMGWHYDONTTHEYCONTROLTHESEBADFREAKINKIDS??? about 100°, I think. It is super hot and super challenging. Ah ha, unlike some people's kids, my phone has a battery that runs out of charge and I have to catch up with you later. Now I know for sure why there are whole resorts that are children free.

You get me, that's why I love you,
Lola

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

46th Tuesday...First Blog of 2010

Happy New Year Readers!

Don't even think about growling at me...I am well aware that we are halfway through January, but I didn't see any of you looking for me. I bet if I were Amy Adams in Julie & Julia, you'd have been searching the streets for me.

As usual there is a lot to discuss today on LolaLand, but please be mindful that unlike in Julie & Julia I do not have loads of time to type away and mull over recipes. Ok, enough with that movie. Let's move on...hold on, did you see it? Is it ok if I give you homework? Today's Aim: Watch Julie & Julia..hehe that could be a spoiler, we will revisit, I promise.

I'm trying to put my thoughts in some sort of order, but I don't see that happening. Remember how I told you that I don't do resolutions? Well I still don't but I do make little flimsy promises to myself and one of those flimsy promises was to go to the gym at least three times a week. So far, I've made it once. Yes..ONCE...in this entire year. You would think since I've missed a couple of blogs, I've been living in the gym, but no. I went on a Monday, maybe last week and I really worked out. There was nothing of note on GymTV so I had to resort to people watching. I love people watching! That reminds me of a new list:

The Things People Wear To The Gym That Cracks Me Up:

1. Matchy-Matchy: My favorite! This person wore black sweats, red and black sneakers, red socks, and the best part, A RED SWEATBAND! He looked like a ladybug.

2. Traveler: I don't know about this guy. He clearly intending on moving into the gym, seeing as he was geared up with his ipod, a cell phone, a gallon of some energy drink, an extra sweatshirt, a backpack and sunglasses. I want to say that he had a tent strapped to his back, but I think you guys will think I'm making that part up.

3. Next Stop, the Club: There was nothing extraordinary about this woman's gym wear except for the fact that she had on huge hoop earrings, two necklaces, a charm bracelet, rings and brace yourself, an anklet which was draped over her sock, because damn it, if you can't see the anklet, what's the point in wearing it?

4. The Girl That I'm Hating On: She doesn't really belong on this list, but this is my blog, therefore a forum for my OWN insecurities. This fit as a gazelle chick was wearing stretch pants and a little (cause anything medium would drown her)black top and a huge rubber velcro belt around her waist. You have seen this blue rubber belt, the one that always rolls either up or down, depending on where your fat is recklessly placed? In my case, by the time I finish working out, its fighting for its rights near my double chin. This girl was so perfect that her blue belt was wrapped around her twice! How do I know that? Because she wore it OUTSIDE her shirt. Yes!!! Outside her shirt and it was wrapped around twice and it looked so unnecessary. I wanted to ask her who she thought she was, floating ballerina like in the gym with the fat belt wrapped around her twice?

I didn't because then I would look crazy. I can't even remember #5, though its probably the girl wearing spandex that looked like jeans because she was trying to take a stand against the no jeans policy. Whatever. Now I can barely get my mind off of the Double Wrapped Gazelle.

I want to call your attention to another blog. I don't want you to leave me, rather I want you to check out this blog written by a very brilliant friend of mine. Yes I have friends, and yes some of them are even brilliant. I'm trying to find the address on my FB, it is TBA. I'm fighting for reception. Hold on...http://instantvyntage.tumblr.com. I don't know why the address is so long, but check it out, its worth your time. Today's Do Now: Check out A New Blog...another spoiler! I'm full of them today.

So I have a new school now, because apparently its believed that I am talented enough to hold down four locations. I am, actually. Listen, if you don't believe in yourself, then it does not matter what anyone else thinks of you. I'm at the new school now and everything looks like its working. Every now and then I get up and walk though the kitchen picking things up, jotting things down and hmmming. It works! You should do that at work. Just grab a notebook or even a file folder with one lousy sheet of paper and go for a walk. You end up looking uber important and together.

Its almost time for me to skidaddle...I can't wait to spell check that one..but first let me leave you with a recipe. This past weekend I made a stuffed blue fish. I looked long and hard for the recipe since I made it a year ago, but after a while I just decided to wing it. It came out really yummy and I want to share...here is what I used for the stuffing:

A can of crab (pricy as hell! I know I paid for the labor)
A can of clams
A can of medium shrimp (I'll never buy them again, because I had to clean them anyway, I'd do fresh next time)
A box of StoveTop Sage Stuffing

I made the stuffing and then mixed everything in...I seasoned, but lightly because the stuffing was seasoned already. Perhaps next time I will dice and sauteed some onions for texture.

Once all that was done, I prepped the fish. First of all, when I went to buy the fish, none of the fish seemed big enough for what I wanted. I spoke to the Fish Monger (lmao) and he told me that he had a fish in the back. Well. Dear Readers, when I tell you this fish was a FISH..I'm not kidding. I would guesstimate from the tip of my middle phalange to a little past my elbow and Dear Readers, I am tall. The FISH was 10lbs. I had them clean & gut and cut off the tail, but I wanted the whole fish. Flashforward or Backward to when it was time to stuff the FISH.

The FISH was too long for the pan. Can you believe that? I tried my damnest to get this heifer in the pan, but it did not work. I had to crudely saw off his head (its in the freezer, I'm going to make soup or send someone a threat) and stuff him. After he was stuffed, he was REALLY BIG. I drizzled some olive oil and placed him in a preheated oven at 350 degrees for 90min.

Delisious, Dear Readers! Mmmm mmmm good. I strongly suggest you try this recipe. I want to make it for Patterson and McKinely, but since its just the three of us, I will stuff three little fish. Speaking of Patterson and McKinely, they really annoyed me yesterday night.

I was going to blog about how annoying they were, but when I woke up today I remembered how much I love them and the mood to gripe is over.

I hate losing a good gripe, but I'm sure someone/thing will inspire one soon.

Last Call, Last Call!! My Very Good Friend Is On Day II of Her Fabulous Maternity Leave...we can't wait to meet him....we love Joaquin already. Its ok for me to mention his name, because his name is going to be in lights or on the new constitution anyway, and then you Dear Readers can refer back to this blog.

You Get Me. That's Why I Love You.


Lola